Skip to content
By using Twitter’s services you agree to our Cookies Use. We and our partners operate globally and use cookies, including for analytics, personalisation, and ads.
  • Home Home Home, current page.
  • About

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Language: English
    • Bahasa Indonesia
    • Bahasa Melayu
    • Català
    • Čeština
    • Dansk
    • Deutsch
    • English UK
    • Español
    • Filipino
    • Français
    • Hrvatski
    • Italiano
    • Magyar
    • Nederlands
    • Norsk
    • Polski
    • Português
    • Română
    • Slovenčina
    • Suomi
    • Svenska
    • Tiếng Việt
    • Türkçe
    • Ελληνικά
    • Български език
    • Русский
    • Српски
    • Українська мова
    • עִבְרִית
    • العربية
    • فارسی
    • मराठी
    • हिन्दी
    • বাংলা
    • ગુજરાતી
    • தமிழ்
    • ಕನ್ನಡ
    • ภาษาไทย
    • 한국어
    • 日本語
    • 简体中文
    • 繁體中文
  • Have an account? Log in
    Have an account?
    · Forgot password?

    New to Twitter?
    Sign up
Aella_Girl's profile
Aella
Aella
Aella
Verified account
@Aella_Girl

Tweets

AellaVerified account

@Aella_Girl

whorelord http://aella.hns.to 

Austin
knowingless.com
Joined September 2012

Tweets

  • © 2021 Twitter
  • About
  • Help Center
  • Terms
  • Privacy policy
  • Cookies
  • Ads info
Dismiss
Previous
Next

Go to a person's profile

Saved searches

  • Remove
  • In this conversation
    Verified accountProtected Tweets @
Suggested users
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @
  • Verified accountProtected Tweets @

Promote this Tweet

Block

  • Tweet with a location

    You can add location information to your Tweets, such as your city or precise location, from the web and via third-party applications. You always have the option to delete your Tweet location history. Learn more

    Your lists

    Create a new list


    Under 100 characters, optional

    Privacy

    Copy link to Tweet

    Embed this Tweet

    Embed this Video

    Add this Tweet to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Add this video to your website by copying the code below. Learn more

    Hmm, there was a problem reaching the server.

    By embedding Twitter content in your website or app, you are agreeing to the Twitter Developer Agreement and Developer Policy.

    Preview

    Why you're seeing this ad

    Log in to Twitter

    · Forgot password?
    Don't have an account? Sign up »

    Sign up for Twitter

    Not on Twitter? Sign up, tune into the things you care about, and get updates as they happen.

    Sign up
    Have an account? Log in »

    Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:

    Country Code For customers of
    United States 40404 (any)
    Canada 21212 (any)
    United Kingdom 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
    Brazil 40404 Nextel, TIM
    Haiti 40404 Digicel, Voila
    Ireland 51210 Vodafone, O2
    India 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon, Reliance
    Indonesia 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel, Indosat, XL Axiata
    Italy 4880804 Wind
    3424486444 Vodafone
    » See SMS short codes for other countries

    Confirmation

     

    Welcome home!

    This timeline is where you’ll spend most of your time, getting instant updates about what matters to you.

    Tweets not working for you?

    Hover over the profile pic and click the Following button to unfollow any account.

    Say a lot with a little

    When you see a Tweet you love, tap the heart — it lets the person who wrote it know you shared the love.

    Spread the word

    The fastest way to share someone else’s Tweet with your followers is with a Retweet. Tap the icon to send it instantly.

    Join the conversation

    Add your thoughts about any Tweet with a Reply. Find a topic you’re passionate about, and jump right in.

    Learn the latest

    Get instant insight into what people are talking about now.

    Get more of what you love

    Follow more accounts to get instant updates about topics you care about.

    Find what's happening

    See the latest conversations about any topic instantly.

    Never miss a Moment

    Catch up instantly on the best stories happening as they unfold.

    1. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl @kaldrenon

      But my brain is like 'Oh, they pattern-match onto 'takes actions to be around other people a lot'", and I can't *un*match that pattern just because they tell me they're different. I don't have control over that level of processing the world.

      2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
    2. Andrew Fallows, your #1 fan‏ @kaldrenon 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl

      I understand it taking a while to make the adjustment - when I learn things about people I've known for a while that correct an assumption I had, I don't necessarily collate it right away. But I also don't reject it, which is what it sounds like you want to do.

      1 reply 0 retweets 16 likes
    3. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @kaldrenon

      I don't have a particular desire around it, I just notice that my brain isn't updating based on the information. Some assumptions do update over time! But the gender thing feels like it belongs in a special category, very close to the way identifying objects feels.

      2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
    4. Andrew Fallows, your #1 fan‏ @kaldrenon 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl

      It definitely takes time to cast off some of the things we grew up with. I spent a long time, when I met a trans non-binary person, subconsciously thinking about how they must have looked before transitioning. I sympathize with that being a difficult abd slow process.

      1 reply 0 retweets 6 likes
    5. Andrew Fallows, your #1 fan‏ @kaldrenon 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @kaldrenon @Aella_Girl

      The distinction comes between whether it's a frustrating process that we're still working on or one that we've decided NOT to do. I got the impression from your original thread that you were in the latter camp.

      1 reply 0 retweets 11 likes
    6. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @kaldrenon

      I feel extremely self-accepting towards myself. I try to notice how I work and not judge it. Often how I work changes! Sometimes it doesn't. Both are okay. If the way I process gender changes, that's fine. If it doesn't, that's also fine. The thing I'm wary about is-

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
    7. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl @kaldrenon

      trying to force myself to view something that i don't. This has happened to me a ton of times in tiny little ways, where I rewrite my perception on myself in order to fit what I think people want from me. I notice incentive to do that here, and I'm being careful not to.

      2 replies 0 retweets 1 like
    8. Andrew Fallows, your #1 fan‏ @kaldrenon 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl

      That makes sense to me, and I certainly wouldn't advocate for the extreme opposite, taking everything other people tell us at face value without evaluation. Ultimately I think the important thing is, as much as possible, to let others be the authority on who they are.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
    9. Andrew Fallows, your #1 fan‏ @kaldrenon 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @kaldrenon @Aella_Girl

      I had to spend a lot of time in a nebulous place as I listened to many people to slowly update my understanding of gender. It took some vulnerability to let go of things I had assumed before. A key to that process was accepting people's personal accounts as sincere and true.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
    10. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @kaldrenon

      I'm sympathetic to this - I know how shitty it is to have people think they know me when they really don't (as happens a LOT on the internet lately). But as with most rules, this rule also isn't really that cut and dry? Like, there's a spectrum here-

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
      Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
      Replying to @Aella_Girl @kaldrenon

      On one hand, having preconceptions about the ways minds work can keep you from expanding or having empathy. On the other hand, accepting people's self-reporting as an absolute indicator of reality is kinda stupid if you do it uncritically. Extreme: trump

      12:35 PM - 6 Apr 2020
      • 2 Likes
      • Marie 🌱 Andrew Fallows, your #1 fan
      3 replies 0 retweets 2 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl @kaldrenon

          A lot of what I write about is the subtle ways we believe things about ourselves to be true that aren't really consistent - about ways society gives us stories that we internalize, about frameworks that we identify with in ways that lock us into stasis.

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
        3. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 6 Apr 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl @kaldrenon

          So my strategy is something like - Broadly, believe that people believe what they say they believe. Believe that their internal framework feels alive and real to them. Treat that with respect. And also, never stop questioning it.

          0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
        4. End of conversation
        1. Andrew Fallows, your #1 fan‏ @kaldrenon 6 Apr 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          Definitely true that both extremes are bad. I skew toward trust on this issue, but as with a lot of things a big part of getting the balance right is sample size. The more individuals I hear from on the subject, the better I get at calibrating.

          0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
          Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
          Undo
        1. oh no‏ @EquineAlt 6 Apr 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl @kaldrenon

          “Asking me to accept nonbinary people’s gender identities is basically like Trump.” That’s a scorching hot one right there.

          0 replies 1 retweet 2 likes
          Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
          Undo

      Loading seems to be taking a while.

      Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

        Promoted Tweet

        false

        • © 2021 Twitter
        • About
        • Help Center
        • Terms
        • Privacy policy
        • Cookies
        • Ads info