body { -ms-overflow-style: scrollbar; overflow-y: scroll; overscroll-behavior-y: none; } .errorContainer { background-color: #FFF; color: #0F1419; max-width: 600px; margin: 0 auto; padding: 10%; font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; } .errorButton { margin: 3em 0; } .errorButton a { background: #1DA1F2; border-radius: 2.5em; color: white; padding: 1em 2em; text-decoration: none; } .errorButton a:hover, .errorButton a:focus { background: rgb(26, 145, 218); } .errorFooter { color: #657786; font-size: 80%; line-height: 1.5; padding: 1em 0; } .errorFooter a, .errorFooter a:visited { color: #657786; text-decoration: none; padding-right: 1em; } .errorFooter a:hover, .errorFooter a:active { text-decoration: underline; } #placeholder, #react-root { display: none !important; } body { background-color: #FFF !important; }

JavaScript is not available.

We’ve detected that JavaScript is disabled in this browser. Please enable JavaScript or switch to a supported browser to continue using twitter.com. You can see a list of supported browsers in our Help Center.

Terms of Service Privacy Policy Cookie Policy Imprint Ads info © 2023 Twitter, Inc.

Conversation

I've always been focused on the social stigma behind sex work, with how men wont date sex workers being evidence. But I totally forgot to consider that men themselves are under intense social pressure to not date sex workers, they get hit with just as much social shameing.

40

8

176

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

I have a few things to say about this. It might take me a minute, and it might not be useful, but it's worth a shot. I'm someone with this stigma re: having a partner that is or was a sex worker. Insofar as I'm transparent to myself, I can go over some of the reasons here.

1

1

4

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

My first wife was a former prostitute. Through her, I ended up working security in a handjob parlour. Through that, I shared a lot of space and time with the women who worked there. This is in a society where prostitution is legal.

1

3

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

It became my opinion, based on the drug, alcohol, relational and mental health issues I saw, that these women had become sex workers primarily from a place of unwellness and limited choices rather than authentic, free agency.

2

8

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

In other words, they weren't "freer", they were compromised. In shorthand, I felt like there was a lot of dark triad shit going on, and perennial self-identity issues that seemed like hell to deal with.

1

3

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

But that's one anecdotal bag of experiences, whatever. I think the same kind of pattern holds in the porn industry, re: rates of addiction, personality pathology, trait neuroticism, and so on.

1

3

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

I honestly acknowledge that there are some, even many people who, at all ends of sex work, pursue that work authentically, from a sturdy foundation of self, and truly enjoy what they're doing.

1

2

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

I think the likelihood of any given man or woman being such a case is rather low. In that way, being a "sex worker" is a roulette wheel of possibilities where 75% of them suggest illness rather than wellness.

1

4

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

If a person is okay with sex work because their Self is somehow compromised, then to build a relationship with them is like building a castle on the edge of an eroding cliff. The structure isn't sound. Maybe it'll be fine, maybe it won't. But it's a bad bet.

1

2

Skeleton Bastard

@SkeletonBastard

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

and

That's all. Sorry for the spam, and sorry if this is all self-evident to you.

1

2

Replying to

@SkeletonBastard

There's the phenomenon where if you ban a subculture from a larger internet forum, they go onto a different website to make their own, and the quality degrades hugely. It has something to do with, people who are willing to switch sites for that subculture are disproportionately-

4:38 PM · Mar 29, 2020

Replying to

and

@SkeletonBastard

dedicated to the subculture, which often takes away the more nuances voices or people who did it for fun. I think this is what's happening with sex work. If you put a huge social barrier in front of sex work, the only people who will cross that barrier have a strong need to do so

2

22

Replying to

and

@SkeletonBastard

So you will see disproportionately troubled, desperate people, and very few nuanced voices of "girls who are trying it out for fun". If you instituted similar walls around other professions I bet you'd see the same effect

15