ok I think the thing about genderpeople that *actually* bothers me is that I feel not allowed to use my own gender framework around them. I honestly don't give a shit how they present, how deviant from gender norms they are, whether they wear makeup or a boy cut. (1/6)
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The last few guys I dated would regularly wear women's clothing and I didn't mind at all. I've applied makeup to many of my male friends!
Despite how I look, I'm also pretty deviant, and deeply sympathize with the difficulty of failing to perform the 'correct' gender norms. (2/6)
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So to reiterate - any expression you want to have with your own body, clothing, mannerism, vocabulary - I welcome it.
But I want to retain ownership over the way gender resonates with me. To me, all that stuff above has very little to do with gender. (3/6)
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To me, expression is independent of gender, and your gender is completely outside of your control; it resides in the eyes of society. Gender *is* an assignment of society. And so when people expect me to view them as a gender I don't view them as, that just does not work.(4/6)
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I can't view them as the gender they want no matter how hard I try.
And to be clear, I still use preferred pronouns and try to do all the least upsetting things for genderpeople. I just am bothered by how afraid I feel to express the way I experience gender. (5/6)
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In my ideal world, they would say "Hey, my pronouns are they/them", and then I'd say "Nice to meet you! I process your gender as your birth sex and don't view you as nonbinary personally, but I'm happy to use your pronouns if that makes you more comfortable." (6/6)
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Totally agree. As a short guy, I'm going to start FUCKING SHRIEKING if anyone looks down while they're talking to me. I'm going to make everyone pretend to look up while they're talking to me, as if I'm taller than they are, and they will address me as "Big Guy", or else!
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I don't really like this attitude. While I don't agree with enby frameworks, I still want to try to maintain compassion and space for them as much as possible. I don't have to understand or get it in order to treat them with respect.
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IM CRYING DID YOU JUST USE THE WORD “GENDERPEOPLE” TO MEAN TRANS PEOPLE LMAO
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no? i meant people who take progressive gender frameworks real seriously, they could be cis
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the "genderpeople" are usually the first people tell people they don't have to do x to be x gender because we know what it's like to have that sort of stuff pushed on us though. Also, please don't call us that, it's about as disrespectful as alphabet people
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I'm happy to find a different term! I want a term that summarizes "People who strongly support the gender framework that treats gender as a self-identification", so if you have a more respectful one you suggest I'm glad to move to it. I used 'genderpeople' cause it felt neutral.
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