"I'm not like that" is a spectrum with two sides and I don't know how to evaluate it. For example: When I was younger, I didn't like romcoms. I wasn't a person who liked it; I was "an intellectual". Of course I eventually matured a bit and figured out I did indeed like romcoms.-
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We're conditioned to take sides since we're little. *what's your favourite animal/colour/etc?" Most of us are in the middle, but we're forced to the extremes. If you're not, you're deemed wishy-washy, or don't have a label. Just look at politics.
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Apologies for the long winded response, here's a screenshot instead spamming too many replies.pic.twitter.com/Q1ck57ASwr
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If their greater values are close to yours, I would lean toward stretch. If their greater values may lead them down a bad path (for me, e.g. high time preference), maybe avoid. Just a litmus.
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You stop when you no longer see a goal that'll keep you going. When you have to ask "why am I doing this again?", you've hit the end. Stretching yourself in an attempt to try something new is necessary and, ultimately, healthy and exxiting, but going too far is a waste of time.
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You just have to rely on your own honesty w/ yourself to determine whether it's working or not. And that can work both ways. Don't stick w/ something that you know deep down isn't working but you think you "ought" to do it. And don't pass on something that requires a bit of work.
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A good starting litmus test IMO, might be to ask yourself "What if I became like that?" If it bothers you that you could ever become "like that" then there's probably an identity element to it. You can also try to catch yourself asking "What would people say?"
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When I was a preteen I adored football and it was part of who I was. When I was a teenager I hated sports because it was part of who I was. As an adult I can finally admit that watching football is kinda fun but there are just too damn many commercials.
End of conversation
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