2/traumatic. Sexual assault on children was considered to be one of the worst things that could happen, and if it happened to me, then it should have seriously fucked me up, right? I started to interpret problems in my life as having been caused by those childhood events.
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3/But after some time, I stopped doing that, because I realized I was trying to force a narrative. In reality, the experience I had as a child had very little, possibly no long-term adverse effects on me. The actual adverse effects came from other things - a sense of
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4/betrayal of adults who were supposed to had been more protective of me, and a serious awkwardness around the molester in later years. I feel a bit of fear saying all this, because THE IMPLICATIONS. Did I want it? Am I saying it wasn't serious? Am I minimizing? Am I delusional?
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5/No, yes, no, and no. I'm being honest about my experience. I also don't mean other people need to interpret their experiences the same way - but I DO recognize that culture seriously pressured me, with partial success, into experiencing suffering I wouldn't have had otherwise.
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There is a truth in this that I’ve often pondered, but never seen earnestly expressed before. You are probably the “strongest” (I feel uncomfortable using this word for this situation. Honest might be better, but it’s an incomplete explanation) person I’ve ever seen.
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Glad the bestiality debacle didn’t prevent you from saying nuanced/difficult things that almost certainly will be misinterpreted and freaked out over.
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This one is way too nuanced for twitter. But she might dodge it because sane people wouldn’t attack a victim. I’m curious about how this will play out here. She was an actor in a powerless position. The “lived experience” argument says she can say anything. Will they let her?
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I was also a victim of childhood molestation and generally agree with your perspective.
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Fascinating illustration of how different individuals' psychological responses can be, and how strongly culture can mask those differences by influencing our interpretations of our experiences and ourselves.
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Thanks for sharing this perspective.
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