I think the thing other people are parsing as 'gender' isn't 'gender' to me. I talked with a nonbinary friend recently who described their nonbinaryness as sort of... not wanting to be misunderstood as having female traits. This is valid! This also is completely different from-
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Interesting. I am very similar and while these traits are more common in males and can therefore be considered masculine I don’t consider myself to be a masculine person in general.
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