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Aella_Girl's profile
Aella
Aella
Aella
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@Aella_Girl

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AellaVerified account

@Aella_Girl

whorelord http://aella.hns.to 

Austin
knowingless.com
Joined September 2012

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    1. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020

      I think the thing other people are parsing as 'gender' isn't 'gender' to me. I talked with a nonbinary friend recently who described their nonbinaryness as sort of... not wanting to be misunderstood as having female traits. This is valid! This also is completely different from-

      10 replies 7 retweets 77 likes
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    2. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020

      what I understand as gender. I think there's some other huge cultural understanding of gender going on that isn't translating into my world. The way I parse gender, how well you are described by typical gender traits have very little to do with the gender you are.

      3 replies 0 retweets 40 likes
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    3. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020

      e.g., if you're an extremely masculine woman (like me!), this doesn't make you less of a woman. In the nonbinary gender framework, it seems like this *does* actually make you less of a woman. This is totally foreign to me.

      7 replies 1 retweet 83 likes
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      Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020

      My conception of gender has a lot to do with common knowledge appearance - how do you read in the world, and how does the world treat you based on how you read? This mostly equals your 'gender'. In this perspective, your gender doesn't belong to you, but to your society.

      4:43 PM - 4 Feb 2020
      • 2 Retweets
      • 39 Likes
      • Louis-Kenzo ra’s al ghul 🦬 1929 Dip-buyer Janelle Stevens Ian Foote Level of Analysis anonymoose Adam Isom QC
      6 replies 2 retweets 39 likes
        1. New conversation
        2. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020

          It's a very 'old' thing - ingrained, and fundamental to how society is constructed (though I don't think it's necessarily good). This other conception of gender, where it's something you identify as, is completely incompatible with the way I understand it.

          1 reply 0 retweets 26 likes
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        3. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020

          I'm not saying I'm rejecting that framework - I'm interested in using it - just the word 'gender' is really confusing things for me. I think when I overlay the word nonbinary onto the base gender, like "nonbinary woman", THEN it makes total sense to me.

          2 replies 1 retweet 25 likes
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        4. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020

          Then that communicates to me - this is someone who is treated by society as the female role, because they have a vagina and look female. They also feel there's aspects of femininity that don't apply to them, and want to be clear to others that they're not a typical woman.

          8 replies 0 retweets 32 likes
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        5. End of conversation
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        2. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020
          Replying to @ZodiacKodiak

          Right, i agree. I also don't really understand it. To me, gender is definitionally not proactive; in my word choice i wouldn't describe the thing they're doing as gender.

          0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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        2. helen!! 573/1k songs‏ @nuanceexists 4 Feb 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          oh this is really interesting- you consider gender an external thing? i wanna like, sit down and write down all the different things gender could be now lmao

          2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes
        3. Aella‏Verified account @Aella_Girl 4 Feb 2020
          Replying to @nuanceexists

          Absolutely! I have trouble conceiving of how it isn't. I feel like my gender rests in other people, not in me.

          1 reply 0 retweets 3 likes
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        1. imuli‏ @ofthelowest 4 Feb 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          So if you take your definition and ask "what do I want my gender to be?", that expands to something like "how do I want people to read me and treat me?", which is most of the actionable parts of gender by their definition.

          0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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        2. Sandbot‏ @Sandbot2 4 Feb 2020
          Replying to @Aella_Girl

          so you know in dreams, you can e.g. see a location as being your hometown, even if it actually has none of the right properties, but you don't notice the discrepancy until you wake up just as other ppl 'read' as m/f to us, we 'read' as m/f to ourselves

          1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
        3. Sandbot‏ @Sandbot2 4 Feb 2020
          Replying to @Sandbot2 @Aella_Girl

          in vast majority, this lines up with others' perceptions / sexual embodiment but if trans, you 'read' yourself as e.g. a man even if everyone in the world disagrees and your body is female as in a dream, you just 'know' even though you have none of the right properties

          1 reply 0 retweets 0 likes
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