Conversation

I personally find it pretty unsexy if a guy has to require verbal consent before kissing me or escalating. I understand why they have to do it but for me personally it's a turnoff and signals an inability to read my body language/lack of social skills.

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Never Again Means Something

@UrbanR14

Feb 3, 2020

Replying to

@Aella_Girl

We really need to come up with some sort of consensus on what is socially acceptable on this front. Right now it feels like there's no clear right thing to do. Obviously you go with what you think your partner wants, but it's hard to push both consent and acting on intuition.

Replying to

and

I don't think we do. Different cultures have different boundaries + subcultures and countercultures from + individuals beyond that. Reading body language and getting to know the ways someone communicates is important. 1/

Replying to

and

We have to view violations of consent within he scope of actual damages from the lack of consent. Violations of consent are simply going to happen on small scales from time to time (This is NOT justification). Examples to consider: 2/

Replying to

and

Weightlifting culture: Hands on hyping of a workout buddy before they attempt a PR. Bedroom: Not wanting to be spoken to or made eye contact with during foreplay. Living together: having a banana without asking ok, but using their toothbrush may cross a line. 3/

Replying to

and

It's impossible to ask everyone for consent for everything they have a right to say no to. Repeated crossing of a sensitive boundary is the real red flag, esp. when the damages are small and easy to fix after one mistake (I'm sorry, new toothbrush, won't happen again).