A person who appears biologically female identifies as male. They are dating a cis man. Would you consider it appropriation (or something similar) for these people to identify as gay?
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Sorry I meant it neutrally
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I don't like the word appropriation, but "gay" is most definitely not the term to describe their relationship.
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I wouldn't consider it either way. What two people do and how they want to feel about it is approximately 0% my business :)
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This is my exact situation! And I've certainly wondered over the gender-politics-logistics.
Dating me has definitely left my cis- and hetero- partner more informed about queerness, but I daresay it doesn't make him any queerer.
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I just dont care. They can call themselves chumbawampus. Appropriation is good and necessary if done respectfuly.
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How two people define their relationship is none of my business. Which is why there should be no preferential treatment, under the law, for any type of relationship.