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With this in mind, nearly all internet arguments become obviously not about changing anybody's mind
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Here's the thing: If you _really_ want to change a typical human's mind about a long-cherished idea, you have to 1) understand why that idea feels emotionally compelling to them, & 2) help them _feel_ why your alternative idea could be even more emotionally compelling.
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The aim isn't to change the mind of the person you're arguing with, it's to give the people in the audience who are receptive to your way of thinking some beliefs they can adopt for themselves.
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Internet arguing is a spectator sport. You're unlikely to change the other person's opinions, but someone watching might change theirs.
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I argue online to help make up my own mind, by exposing myself to other peoples' arguments and concepts. Convincing others is great, but usually it's unlikely; most people choose according to authority rather than their own reason.