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Aella
@Aella_Girl
Carl and Bob agree that neither of them will spend time alone with another friend. Five years into their friendship, Bob secretly meets up for beers and shooting pool with Alice. Carl asks him where he was -Bob lies. Carl finds out and, furious, ends the friendship. (cont)
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
So like - Bob did make an agreement, break it, and lie. But this seems of secondary importance to the fact that they literally made each other promise something that is really hard to do in the long run, out of what's probably severe insecurity, and not actually healthy. (cont)
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
When I see monogamous people cheat in media (or real life?), this is sort of the reaction I have. Yeah - they did break an agreement and lie. But seriously how is nobody talking about the insane agreement they felt pressured to enter in the first place?? No shit they cheated!
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
but that's not really the point - if people in the agreement naturally don't want to have other friends anyway, then you don't need the agreement! And if you do need the agreement in order to prevent behavior, then it *is* a struggle!
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Aella
@Aella_Girl
Sure, but I want to know why that argument wouldn't be applied to justify a lot of other situations we consider bad because they involve struggle and suffering (e.g., abusive relationships)?