I personally don't 'get' what women mean when they talk about experiencing sexism and harassment and lack of safety - I don't relate to it or experience it very much, and I know some other women who agree. It's weird the disparity here, that some women report so much trouble...
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Harassment seems to happen more to them and less to me and some other women I know. I was brought up in a culturally isolated environment and in my formative years rarely experienced sexually predatory men, and I think that gave me some subconscious fearlessness
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That now functions as a signal to men that they'll get less a reaction from me. For example, I generally like being catcalled, and get catcalled less than most women I know.
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You just happen to be lucky. You are saying though that somehow with my being I made a Cambridge professor sexually assault me. While you are not directly blaming me, you indirectly try to shift the blame from the man who assaulted all women in his path, irrespective of age/looks
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This feels kind of subtly complicated. I don't know for sure what's going on but I really, really don't think it's pure luck. And I hate the idea that I can't investigate factors about women that affect how often they experience assault because I need to worry about blame.
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I don't want to pile on here, but I don't understand how you can see "prey vibe" and "harassment is their fault" as not being somewhat equivalent. How else can "prey vibe" be taken?
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So there's a way in which it is their fault, in the way everything that happens to you is your fault. But I view it like, I'm fine with saying tallness is what causes people to hit their heads on doorframes, but I don't think 'tallness is your fault' is useful here.
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