When someone requests you "they/them" pronouns and identifies as neither man nor woman, but as 'nonbinary,' (and regardless of your respect for them/your compliance with the pronouns!), you internally/instinctively tend to view them as ____
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Like facial recognition, sex recognition is deeply innate and automatic. It’s tough to ignore that.
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i don't know about everyone, but with my friend who goes by that answers to ay bro gurl bitch etc. hes genetically male, but personally likes all terms.
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I have yet to interact with a they/them person enough to deprogram myself, but I'm open to it. I'm not too great at forcing myself to think anything, but I'd be open to habituating myself to whatever compassion dictates.
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I'll still be respectful and use they/them but there's just something hardwired in my brain that makes it not feel natural. I'm not trying to be disrespectful, it's just not as natural as using, for example, female pronouns with transitioning trans women.
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I have met transsexuals who do flip that circuit for me, though.
But non-binary, ambiguously gendered? Not really ever, as far as I know.
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I find it is the choices they have made in how they present themselves. Wearing pink with long hair and noticeable make up. I'm going to think this person wants to be feminine and be treated that way. It can be tougher the other way.
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