Routine extremely disrupted. I am quite discombobulated by it. Gonna snarf leftovers and then... I dunno.
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Having a ham sandwich with thin slices of apple; cranberry sauce; and a tiny bit of mayo
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It's kind of amazing how much anxiety the disruption of my routine provokes. Thanks brain, I hate it. Anyway I gotta go put gas in my car then I guess I'll just go back to the Yurt?
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Part of the prob with my mental health is that 6 weeks ago my doc stopped refilling my 60mg duloxetine. That took me cold turkey from 90mg/day to 30mg/day. My mental health has taken an absolute nose dive. I don't know why no refills so don't reply asking why.
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I have called the office repeatedly and sent messages through the app but can't get an answer. I haven't been able to afford an appointment because Xita had her medical prob, Cole the ox developed a cough, and Beamer Border Collie needed to get caught up on shots.
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Insurance won't pay for me to see the doctor for some reason so it's $285 every time I go in and vet bills have meant I don't have $285 to go ask what the fuck.
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So anyway I've gone from someone with severe treatment resistant depression who was coping and functioning well to someone who is not actually coping and functioning well. Also it turns out duloxetine was doing a lot to manage my fibromyalgia.
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So my mental and physical functioning right now are basically trash right now is what I'm saying. Bear with me.
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Depression, anxiety, and chronic pain are all raging, I'm getting constant "zaps", I have no appetite, I have no executive function, and I can't handle the disruption of my routine because that's my substitute for executive function.
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And I don't know why this is happening to me because no one will tell me why the doc won't give me a goddamned refill.
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This sucks, I’m sorry friend.
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