Well, since this is now public, let me just say I hope you’ll reconsider. I think it could be a great interview.
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ACABylon Bee
@ACABylonBee
The official Twitter account of the ACABylon Bee on Twitter.
following me = endorsement
ACABylon Bee’s Tweets
Just heard from a friend at Twitter HQ, they're in full-on crisis mode as the notification non-doubling service is crashing and they can't bring it up
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they finally switched the @ to a font that distinguishes lower case L and upper case i, sad day
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wow all of a sudden im getting twice the engagement, elon is saving twitter!!
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Twitter's not going to just suddenly crash, it's just going to get gradually worse and worse while it loses more money than you can conceive
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Who the fuck is tweeting this shit. Your cage isn't bad friends it's a Romanian prison
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If the people in your circle don’t inspire you.
They’re not your circle.
They’re your cage.
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Deleting because this is too hacky
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👀
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Kevin McCarthy tells me that @elonmusk came to his office “to wish me a happy birthday.”
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You want me to believe the cows are herding you??
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"Reverse racism" is not a real thing. Like reverse cowgirl
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The arc of leftist influencers is long but it bends toward rightwing grifts
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You think you're job is safe? ChatGPT can write a full year's worth of shitposts in under 10 minutes
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This is a distraction to fool you into caring about running and swimming, don't fall for it
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International Olympic Committee plans to let Russia and Belarus compete even as genocidal invasion of Ukraine is ongoing. Another sick move from this corrupt body
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Feels memeable
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You probably missed this but another Republican announced he was running for President while his pregnant wife literally passed out in the background
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For the millionth time men who do this bit are guaranteed cheaters
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Please don't dunk on Graham Linehan's appearance; he won't see it but your friends who have received face transplants will ❤️
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Please, I'm an expert on Florida women, if you see a Florida woman in a storm drain, do not disturb it in its natural habitat
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Florida woman rescued from storm drain for third time in less than two years trib.al/Z61l04l
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th* Fr*nch
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We recommend avoiding general and often dehumanizing “the” labels such as the poor, the mentally ill, the French, the disabled, the college-educated. Instead, use wording such as people with mental illnesses. And use these descriptions only when clearly relevant.
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Defending freedom and property since 1776 baby 😎
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In a speech to a US corporate lobby group, Ukraine's Zelensky thanked Black Rock, JP Morgan, Goldman Sachs, Elon Musk's Starlink, promising:
“Everyone can become a big business by” buying up Ukrainian assets
“We are defending freedom and property”
More: geopoliticaleconomy.com/2023/01/25/ukr
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This is absolutely insane.
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By the largest estimate, fare evasion costs MTA $500 million. MTA is facing a $3 billion budget cliff. Paying cops to beat up and arrest poc who jump a turnstile isn't going to solve MTA budget issues
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It's not my job to educate you, Your Honor
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I don't care if millions see my tweets, just want them to hit one person hard
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DETAILS: Rick Ross won't ride in Teslas because he's afraid they will automatically drive him to the police
"I've always had in the back of my mind, the government could tap into the brain of the car. 'OK, where's Rick? Nah, bring him in for questioning.'
xxlmag.com/rick-ross-scar
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we have the dumbest fucking government imaginable
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They telling on themselves LMAO
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ChatGPT passed a Wharton MBA exam.
Time to overhaul education.
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Everything reminds me of her
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NASA has now discovered 5,241 other planets outside our solar system, with 195 of them being “Earth-like” 
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Would you rather have a pepe avatar bf or ____ yourself
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I guess if you're the one doing the scamming you won't be too bitter
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My advice would be don't give your money away to scams
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A message from JUJUBES.
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The World is largely the way it is because we didn't execute enough confederates and plantation owners
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Confederate funeral today in Virginia. These are the same people who tell black people "slavery was so long ago, get over it:"
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Usually when you accuse someone of saying something something you post what they said, not what you said.. maybe wait for someone else to confirm before believing Gaetz is about to be arrested
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(person who has never worked) the retirement age should be raised actually
(after one day of work) fuck. holy fuck
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