50 Nerds of Grey

“Come over,” she begged. “I need you right now!” “Just turn it off and on again,” he sighed. He hated these late night rebooty calls.

“Call me something to make me feel desperate and worthless!” he begged as he licked the heel of her stiletto. “Very well,” she said, “ How about Logan Paul?”

“I love it really slow,” she whispered sensually. So he updated her iPhone 6.

She lay back and braced herself as he tried to get it up for the third time that day. She should never have got him that drone for Christmas.

He sat rigid and helpless while she gave him the ultimate punishment. She talked all through the Doctor Who Christmas episode. #DoctorWho

'Hurt me!' she begged, leaning over the dining table expectantly. 'OK,' he replied, 'Your turkey's dry and your sprouts are overcooked.'

"Say bad things to me," she begged, biting her lip as she stared up into his cold grey eyes, “Terrible, unforgivable things!" "OK," he said, “Phantom Menace is better than The Last Jedi.”

"I've been a VERY naughty girl!" she whispered, slowly raising her skirt and bending over his knee. "I deserve to be punished!" "OK," he said, and invited his mother to stay for Christmas.

He lay helpless on the floor, his hands tied behind his back and his mouth covered with tape. He may be a genius but he was terrible at wrapping Christmas presents.

She liked a man who took risks . . . so he ordered her Christmas present from Amazon.

'I can't hold on any longer!' he cried, panting and sweating. 'Well, you'll have to,' she said, 'The Last Jedi doesn't open till next week . . .’

She staggered through the door, ashamed to have been part of such a painful, humiliating experience . . . She should never have let him take her to see Justice League.

Why is new Twitter like a Netflix series? It has way too many characters and takes twice as long as it needs to. #Twitter280characters

‘It’s so long!’ she gasped, biting her lip. ‘I don’t know what I’m going to do with it!’ ‘Don’t worry,’ he said, smiling calmly. ‘Just do what you usually do, but for twice as long . . .’ #Twitter280Characters

'Come on!' she begged, lying naked before him. 'Do something wild!!’ 'OK,' he said, and closed his laptop without shutting it down first . .

“So why do you call it Thor’s Hammer?” she asked. “Because it’s so potent?” “No” he replied. “Because I’m the only one who’s ever held it.”

“So” she said, sensually drawing her fingernails down his back “I hear you’re a player.” “Yes,” he said smoothly. “Zelda, Scrabble and D&D.”