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whoredujour

  1. Nothing to see here. Nervous/Emotional/Psychological breakdowns happen every day in this town. Good day to you. 7:57 AM Dec 2nd from web
  2. When I get lonely I wish I had a pet, but they can't talk. So I'd still technically be alone. Maybe I can get a midget instead? 5:29 PM Dec 1st from web
  3. The word whore isn't derogatory. Call me a slut and I'm insulted. They fuck any one. Whores have standards. 1:27 PM Dec 1st from web
  4. I can cook dinner or wait for a cute guy to call me and ask me out. Never mind. Cooking it is. 1:16 PM Dec 1st from web
  5. I contemplated a career in comedy, but unless they change it from stand up, to lay down, I'm not interested. 12:56 PM Dec 1st from web
  6. He told me to take my pants off. Then, to lay down and relax. All he needs to do is kiss me and this GYN visit is the best one ever. 12:32 PM Dec 1st from web
  7. He said it never happened before. So, apparently with everyone else he can fuck for hours, but I get $12 dollar pasta and 9 minutes. 8:34 PM Oct 13th from web
  8. The chimichanga with beans I had for lunch means that not only won't I get anyone else to fuck me, but I won't even want to fuck myself. 12:50 PM Oct 13th from web
  9. Its a three day weekend. I haven't been this excited since KY sent free samples in the mail. 11:18 AM Oct 9th from web
  10. Being a grownup means I have to pay bills and handle responsibilities, but it also means I can have pretzels and m&m's for breakfast. 6:05 AM Oct 8th from web
  11. I'm trying to figure out this Twitter thing. And I'm anxious to get to the part where I sleep with some of you to gain followers. 2:21 PM Oct 7th from web
  12. Deciding on a pair of panties. Boy shorts will spend most of the day stuck in my crack. Granny panties will slide down my hip. I can't win. 5:29 AM Oct 2nd from web
  13. I guess since I don't have my tits as my avatar, i won't be getting any followers anytime soon? 3:03 PM Sep 29th from web
  14. He said he'd call me later. I'll just turn my ringer off so he doesn't hear me hiding in his closet when he does. 2:48 PM Sep 29th from web
  15. Somebody needs to talk me through this. Preferably with no pants on. 2:29 PM Sep 29th from web
  16. Relationship drama is like crack, and I'm an addicted, shoeless hobo. 2:20 PM Sep 29th from web