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whlteXbread

  1. @jayhawking Am I supposed to be scared of a group of people whose name is a portmanteau containing the word "wang"? A mob of Lady's Men? about 7 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to jayhawking
  2. Ham as it ever was. about 15 hours ago from Tweetie
  3. MOLLEE FOR PRESIDENT OF MY SOUL 8:07 PM Dec 1st from Tweetie
  4. @FanEffingTastic You're right. After drinking that concoction I have no right to be called anything other than a lady. 9:13 PM Nov 29th from Tweetie in reply to FanEffingTastic
  5. Just so you know, gin, disaronno, and bitters DON'T open up the portal to the Land of Naked Ladies. Despite this colorful spinning water. 8:45 PM Nov 29th from Tweetie
  6. Well I guess Family Guy is making ads for Windows 7 so I guess that means I'll be drinking solely Mike's Hard Lemonade from now on. 7:22 PM Nov 29th from Tweetie
  7. I need you to be precisely as excited about me as I am about you. 2:54 AM Nov 29th from Birdhouse
  8. "I'd eat you if you bred me." 9:37 PM Nov 27th from SimplyTweet
  9. Right now this feels more like Halloween than Thanksgiving. 10:10 AM Nov 26th from SimplyTweet
  10. GUYS. I figured out how Trader Joe's makes their wine. They buy wine in a box, pour it in a Nalgene bottle and let it sit for a day. 10:49 PM Nov 23rd from SimplyTweet
  11. If any of you are wondering why it reeks of soul in my office it's because reviewing poorly crafted technical documents makes me fart. 5:19 PM Nov 23rd from Birdhouse
  12. @thecolournerd Let me make sure I'm understanding what you're saying: you're looking for an aggressive phallus-y? 12:43 AM Nov 23rd from SimplyTweet in reply to thecolournerd
  13. @thecolournerd I'll show you a phallus-y. 12:35 AM Nov 23rd from SimplyTweet in reply to thecolournerd
  14. Someday. Someday I'll make something that means this much to this many people. 8:43 PM Nov 21st from SimplyTweet
  15. Watching the Fray. I haven't felt this much like a school girl since the last time I wet my panties. 8:17 PM Nov 21st from SimplyTweet
  16. What is it about walking against traffic, hair blowing in my eyes, squinting into headlights, hands in pockets that makes me feel so…lonely? 9:18 PM Nov 19th from SimplyTweet
  17. Merlin Mann would beat these two down with his flaccid dick and then teabag them with retweets. (marry me @hotdogsladies!) 8:12 PM Nov 19th from SimplyTweet
  18. The two douchebags standing right behind me and screaming in my ear use Twitter for social media instead of jokes. LOL. #denvertweetup 7:52 PM Nov 19th from SimplyTweet
  19. @thecolournerd I live in a neighborhood of geezers so there's no reason. Maintenance? Maybe? 12:05 AM Nov 19th from SimplyTweet in reply to thecolournerd
  20. So, Comcast? May I have a word? In the past hour, my AT&T wireless data connection has been more reliable than my cable internet. Nice. 11:59 PM Nov 18th from Tweetie