verdandi
-
my office smells like new shower curtains, & the name of this grad school sounds like a cat coughing up a hairball. how do you THINK i feel?
9:25 PM Dec 14th
from web
-
Your Twitter insights have been amusing me for over two years now. That shit's out of control.
9:14 AM Dec 6th
from web
-
"I love eating these when I'm hopped up on coke and doing spreadsheets." -Man holding cookies to chick in checkout line at the grocery store
9:10 AM Dec 6th
from web
-
DO YOU SEE HOW SERIOUS I AM? I HAVE A SPREADSHEET. DO NOT FUCK WITH MY SPREADSHEET.
9:58 AM Dec 5th
from web
-
I aspire to wear sunglasses as meaningfully as David Caruso.
11:39 AM Dec 4th
from web
-
Fbook page: sanitized. It now features ABSOLUTELY NO references to arson, Tranny Night, psychosis, Monty Python, Mormons.
Ok, maybe a few.
9:28 AM Dec 4th
from web
-
If you'd rather talk to someone with a reflection, lurk about the restroom & wait for another victim.My avatar & I don't need your attitude.
4:49 AM Dec 4th
from web
-
Prof admitted Fbook-stalking me. Fine, dude. I have a decent chance of fulfilling all normalcy requirements...
unless you get on Twitter.
4:00 AM Dec 4th
from web
-
Me: "I don't know what I'd even do with $100,000."
Lex: "You'd hoard it. And buy cats."
11:13 PM Dec 2nd
from TwitterBerry
-
Oh hi, SF. Guess I didn't need to wear this parka, did I?
Btw, if anyone sees some crazy chick cavorting in her skivvies, it's not me.
6:48 PM Nov 22nd
from TwitterBerry
-
just to be clear, i touch my phone in a very heterosexual way.
11:50 PM Nov 21st
from web
-
Dad:"They all come to meetings & whip these things out to show off their 'apps.'Bip, bip, tap.What could be gayer than touching your phone?"
11:22 AM Nov 21st
from web
-
Insomnia. Time to seek out & engage in ill-advised, high-risk activities. Like flossing without a mirror.
Too legit to quit, guera-style.
1:32 AM Nov 20th
from web
-
HEY GUYSH i'm coming to SF/Oakland this weekend! We should all catch a meal together! In public!
3:40 PM Nov 19th
from web
-
MOST AWKWARD SOUP AWARD: a whole wonton *will* fit into my mouth, but makes an obscene SPLORT when violently expelled from throat to floor.
3:37 PM Nov 19th
from web
-
I do NOT need a haircut. No PhD program would dare reject an interviewee who could so successfully channel that girl from _The Ring._
5:30 PM Nov 14th
from web
-
Oh goody, a magnifying mirror. It's like watching _Pores: the IMAX Experience._
1:36 PM Nov 8th
from web
-
Side effects of this medication include headache, nausea, and severe agitation due to fucking impossible-to-open childproof blister packs.
1:33 PM Nov 7th
from TwitterBerry
-
Oh. The annoying bastard thing that tickled my sternum all day was the shirt tag.
♪♫ My head-bone is connected to my/ Ass bone ♫♪
10:58 PM Nov 4th
from web
-
"White guilt" was invented when men realized they couldn't convincingly blame PMS.
12:06 PM Nov 4th
from web
|
- Name verdandi
- Location Monster truck laser light show
- Bio My grandfather was a barracuda, so I'm easily distracted by shiny objects.
|
