timothygreen
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Shooting birdshot at a ghost. Ashy snow. Christmas dinner. Grandma's urn on the mantle.
9:32 AM Oct 11th
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Up all night trying to find an outfit for senior picture day. Fall asleep and miss my 9:03 AM appt. Eat mashed potatoes with my bare hands.
12:41 PM Oct 10th
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No cars, everyone bicycles everywhere. Cops and criminals, cameramen trailing the chase. Laurel Canyon is a bitch, deadly up and down.
12:53 PM Oct 8th
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Aliens invade. We flee through a portal to the past, ancient Egypt. Must warn humanity to prepare a defense--but how? Hieroglyphics.
12:30 PM Oct 7th
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Our neighbor the rapper gives us a housewarming gift, a contraption he calls a seXbox - all gears and winches - how the hell does it work?
12:16 PM Oct 6th
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John Stewart's kid is kidnapped. Give him a consoling lasagna lined with funny papers. Ride home on my father's Harley, leaking oil.
12:07 PM Oct 5th
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Build a dog house out of books I don't like. Dog don't like them either, but they keep him dry.
1:10 PM Oct 1st
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So thirsty I pawn-swap my samurai sword for a six-pack of Gatorade. "Anything that can slice through your fat neck's gotta be worth $15."
12:20 PM Sep 30th
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Big bird in full plume, center stage. Krapp's Last Tape.
5:25 PM Sep 26th
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My new Cadillac morphs into a motorcycle, then a scouter, then a handcar on a rail line you refuse to help pump.
3:27 PM Sep 25th
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Rundown bowling lane 3 feet off the ground like it's skee-ball. Cracks in the wood, hills and troughs, dead spots. Frustrates my game.
4:56 PM Sep 23rd
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Small town festival in our honor - the prodigal son returns to perform, but I forgot my magic guitar, can't remember two chords.
12:44 PM Sep 21st
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Rent a room at the A-maize-ing Corn Palace in Souix Falls, SD. The walls are thick, but you can walk right through them.
1:11 PM Sep 18th
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Big dog dying seeks shade. Finds a ditch to lie in. We have to leave him be.
1:59 PM Sep 17th
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The wheels fall off our coaster car halfway up a hill. We're forced to walk it out; monkey-bar the corkscrews, hedgehog the loopty-loops.
2:04 PM Sep 16th
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At the end of an Allman Bros reunion show, Steve Miller shoots out the lights, hits a kid hanging from a chandelier. "Lucky shot!" you yell.
12:25 PM Sep 14th
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The neighbors ritually bathe their baby in radio waves. Choose random passages from books for it to live by. Should we call the police?
9:37 AM Sep 13th
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I tell Jeter, "Just get on base and I'll hit you in," tying run, but he K's to end the game, for some reason we're playing on a golf course.
12:19 PM Sep 11th
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On the way to Halloween, Megan the Snow Fairy introduces me to the decaying skeleton she cheated on me with three years before we met.
1:37 PM Sep 10th
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Zombie spiders inherit the house we moved from. Can't kill'em; try to crush'em and still they twitch. More comedy than horror.
1:58 PM Sep 9th
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- Name Timothy Green
- Location Studio City, CA
- Web http://www.timoth...
- Bio Editor of the poetry journal RATTLE, first book is AMERICAN FRACTAL. This is my dream diary.
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