thedayhascome
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I'm bringing sexy back right after I take a nap.
about 9 hours ago
from Birdhouse
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I trust my mother-in-law about as far as I can throw her, which isn't very far considering her enormous girth.
about 17 hours ago
from Birdhouse
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Today, we kill the Thanksgiving turkey from a helicopter with a high-powered rifle, just as the Pilgrims once did.
about 18 hours ago
from Birdhouse
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Thanksgiving is a time for coming together with family and pushing old people down at Walmart for a good deal.
4:46 PM Nov 25th
from Birdhouse
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It's always been a dream of mine to be a handler for Balloon Boy in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.
9:28 AM Nov 25th
from Birdhouse
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This is the time of year when we all give thanks for stretchy pants.
6:44 AM Nov 25th
from web
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My wife said she needed a little TLC, but I told her that band broke up like five years ago.
5:10 PM Nov 24th
from Birdhouse
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I've had a productive day spinning really fast in my swivel chair, so I'm leaving work early.
11:12 AM Nov 24th
from web
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Applying the George Costanza work ethic to the rest of my afternoon.
11:11 AM Nov 23rd
from Birdhouse
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There are no more donuts in the conference room. If I remember correctly, this exactly how '2012' ends.
8:49 AM Nov 23rd
from Birdhouse
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That's the sound of my coworker blaring Mannheim Steamroller and me sharpening the teeth of my staple remover.
6:58 AM Nov 23rd
from web
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I'm so fat, I feel like a KFC chicken buckling under its own weight.
6:27 PM Nov 22nd
from Birdhouse
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Apparently, I don't know how to fold a towel or please a woman.
4:57 PM Nov 22nd
from Birdhouse
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I like my coffee how I like your mom. In the morning.
7:06 AM Nov 21st
from web
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The women's restroom attendant always screams at me and never offers a hand towel or even a Black & Mild.
5:40 PM Nov 20th
from web
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It's amazing how no sleep and a handful of pills I found locked inside of a hospital medication cart can make you feel.
6:26 AM Nov 18th
from Birdhouse
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Thanks for the kind words, everyone. Lucy is doing a little better now in the intensive care unit. I'm counting my grey hairs.
6:08 PM Nov 17th
from Tweetie
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Lucy scared us earlier. She stopped breathing and was in respiratory distress. Had an ambulance ride to the hospital. Currently in the ER.
1:10 PM Nov 17th
from Tweetie
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To celebrate the Leonid Meteor Shower, I'm going streaking.
9:07 AM Nov 17th
from web
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Too cold to take the baby for a walk, so I put her on the treadmill instead and boy she was really keeping up there for a while.
4:22 PM Nov 16th
from Birdhouse
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- Name Josh Hopkins
- Location Indianapolis, IN
- Web http://thedayhasc...
- Bio father. husband. vegetarian. web designer. programmer. artist. geek. thinker. doer.
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