the_onion
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[audio] Miracle Powder Turns Water Into Delicious Fruity Drink: Onion Radio News - with Doyle Redland
about 11 hours ago
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Opinion: Like Hell I'm Going To Let Some Black President Help Me Pay For Dialysis (by Dan Laird): I take pride in w...
about 20 hours ago
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Sports: Nets Announce Team Is In Re-Demolition Mode: EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ—In a continuing effort to destroy their ...
about 20 hours ago
from twitterfeed
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Boarding School Student Receives Wet William: DEERFIELD, MA—Deerfield Academy first-year Foster R. Poole III told...
about 21 hours ago
from twitterfeed
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Shakira Just Not Feeling Up To Jiggling Ass Today: News In Photos
about 21 hours ago
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Oprah To End Her Talk Show: Oprah Winfrey announced last week that she would end her talk show in 2011. What do yo...
about 21 hours ago
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Department Of Needing Transportation: 'Anyone Heading To Tucson This Weekend?': PHOENIX—Addressing the nation fro...
about 22 hours ago
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In Focus: Thousands Gather For Stuffing Of Giant Rockefeller Center Turkey: NEW YORK—"Lines were long but I wante...
10:20 AM Nov 23rd
from twitterfeed
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Boy Finds Own Real-Life E.T.:
7:57 AM Nov 23rd
from twitterfeed
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'The Office' Ends As Documentary Crew Gets All The Footage It Needs: SCRANTON, PA—After nearly six years on the a...
7:41 AM Nov 23rd
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Sports: Bengals' Uniforms No Longer Look Stupid Now That Team Is Good: BRISTOL, CT—By wearing their brightly colo...
7:41 AM Nov 23rd
from twitterfeed
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Costco Nixes Coke Sales: Due to a disagreement over pricing, bog box wholesale club Costco is not carying Coca Cola...
7:06 AM Nov 23rd
from twitterfeed
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New 'Noveller' Allows People To Post Novels They Write During Course Of Their Day: SAN FRANCISCO—"I love it," sai...
6:51 AM Nov 23rd
from twitterfeed
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[audio] Celebrities Seize Africa: Onion Radio News - with Doyle Redland
8:09 AM Nov 22nd
from twitterfeed
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Check It Out: Deer: News In Photos
9:18 AM Nov 21st
from twitterfeed
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Sports: Several 2009 MLB Awards Clearly Thought Up On The Spot: NEW YORK—A number of players suggested to reporte...
8:09 AM Nov 21st
from twitterfeed
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Nation's Music Snobs Protest Predictable Use Of Metallica, Pantera To Torture Prisoners: WASHINGTON—"What those p...
6:49 AM Nov 21st
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In Focus: Overweight College Student Announces Plans To Wear Shorts, Sandals For Rest Of Year: STATE COLLEGE, PA—...
9:29 AM Nov 20th
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Sports: LeBron James Encourages NBA To Stop Jumping In Honor Of Michael Jordan: WASHINGTON—Prior to Wednesday's g...
8:03 AM Nov 20th
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Senator Byrd The Longest-Serving Lawmaker: After more than 56 years in office, 92-year-old Sen. Robert C. Byrd (D-WV...
8:03 AM Nov 20th
from twitterfeed
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