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swyh

  1. Don't die wondering 9:48 AM Dec 11th from web
  2. I think everyone is Australian 6:05 AM Dec 7th from web
  3. Hooligans have knocked over a bin in Shaftsbury! 8:59 PM Dec 5th from TweetDeck
  4. There's something timeless about neighbours squabbling over a foot of land 6:06 AM Nov 28th from web
  5. Fucking sun comes up every fucking morning 2:47 AM Nov 28th from web
  6. Feckless youth too lazy to escape from jail 8:56 AM Nov 27th from web
  7. Six lumps of sugar in one cup of tea. 50 cups like this per day. Don't tell me I can't. 5:07 AM Nov 26th from web
  8. Dear Arm, please do as I say from now on. I am in charge; you are not. Sincerely, the Brain. 8:02 AM Nov 25th from web
  9. Imaginary puppies 4:24 AM Nov 18th from web
  10. I am optimistic about the future of the egg 3:08 AM Nov 7th from web
  11. Operated upon by children... 3:12 PM Nov 4th from web
  12. Untalkative youth will be your guide on your final journey 1:10 AM Nov 3rd from web
  13. I want to go south: down, down the map into orange groves and smoking rivers and barefoot women. 4:58 AM Oct 30th from web
  14. Inside every Parisian shopworker lurks a revolutionary who cannot be bought 4:39 AM Oct 29th from web
  15. 'Teacher awarded for helping kids learn how to blog about death and mortality.' Should be a rule against world-gone-mad stories on Mondays 5:59 AM Oct 26th from web
  16. Just vomited after opening the reduced-to-clear chicken I bought for dinner. Nothing like wretch-induced tears to ruin an appetite 11:07 AM Sep 28th from web
  17. Fools rush in... but remain in foyer area since they do not have requisite authorisation to continue further 12:39 PM Sep 23rd from web
  18. Disparaging the boot is a bootable offence 3:08 AM Sep 8th from web
  19. People managed to remember birthdays for centuries before Facebook. 4:05 PM Aug 27th from web
  20. For the first time in my life, there are ants in my pants. Not the worst sensation in the world, but still... Best avoided 11:12 AM Aug 3rd from Twitterrific