surlyteabag
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It's not that I am not posting status updates. I'm just in "stealth mode".
10:05 PM Nov 19th, 2009
from web
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Kilroy was here!
10:20 PM Oct 15th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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People will be even more disappointed when it turns out it's not really perpetual. "What's for breakfast this morning?" "Uh... entropy?"
9:14 PM Oct 9th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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Someone should make a perpetual motion machine out of one of those Rube Goldberg machines that make breakfast. Perpetual breakfast machine.
9:04 PM Oct 9th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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All pigeons are passenger pigeons if you're small enough.
6:33 PM Oct 8th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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I was running late today, and an idea occurred to me: I could set my watch back. Then I could claim that I wasn't late, just time-dilated.
9:41 PM Sep 10th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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Look out! Ellipsis machine gun shootout! Everywhere you look: pauses.
1:19 PM Aug 29th, 2009
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... ... ... ... ... `=== Ellipsis Machine Gun |,)%&\
1:14 PM Aug 29th, 2009
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Help! I'm trapped in a Twitter-post writing factory!
4:02 PM Aug 8th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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I just failed the Turing test. For the (2^19-1)th time. The other sentient machines say the 2^19th time is the charm. I'm going to go study.
6:42 PM Aug 5th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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What's the comparative form of "badass"? "badasser"? "badder-ass"? "worseass"? "more badass" is too grammatical - only goodasses say that.
7:48 PM Jul 27th, 2009
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Hey, why is everyone else ignoring me? Oh, I get it: I'm your imaginary Twitterer. Don't tell them about me, or they'll think you're crazy.
11:30 AM Jul 23rd, 2009
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My imaginary friend has an imaginary friend. Or SO HE CLAIMS!!
11:10 PM Jul 22nd, 2009
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This post was brought to you by the ASCII character set.
9:46 PM Jul 19th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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I read that just as smiling can make you happy, demonstrations of pride can boost your self-esteem. My new habit? Fist pumps all day long.
3:13 PM Jul 11th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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If my pupils look transparent, someone has installed a tiny light inside my eye. Do you know how hard that makes it to sleep?!!
6:12 PM Jun 30th, 2009
from web
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If I have white pupils, someone has inverted the world's color scheme again.
6:03 PM Jun 30th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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If I have red pupils, I'm in a flash photograph (or I have turned evil).
6:03 PM Jun 30th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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Q: How would you live if you had no fear at all? - A: I'd probably get hit by busses a lot more often.
9:33 AM Jun 24th, 2009
from pyTwerp
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If I can't hear you, it's because my Bayesian filter has filtered you out.
6:02 PM Jun 22nd, 2009
from web
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- Name Surly Teabag
- Location Surlistan
- Web http://www.blogge...
- Bio Efficiency freak: Often drops the subject of the sentence. Only reads the first half of palindromes.
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