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  1. This from a man who, if he had his way, would not hire a single heterosexual onto his already gay-supremacist staff. http://bit.ly/SIJ3F
  2. @paulconstant I find nothing funny about that. John Bolton is a great diplomat and a fine conservative. I would cruise with him any time.
  3. This conflation of a media-hungry, insane child endangerer with Sarah Palin is a low blow, even for The Stranger: http://bit.ly/i1Aor
  4. @golob Fie on your conspiracy theories! I suppose you are one of those morons who believe Iraq did not attack us on 9/11.
  5. My littlest secretary threatened to quit after I called her a dwarf in my column this week. Her tiny hands quavered with rage; adorable!
  6. This is the worst Fourth of July in history. I plan to down mint juleps by the score and try to learn how to appreciate Bobby Jindal.
  7. Now that Sarah has resigned to create more Trigs for us to love, the Liberal Media keeps pummeling her with falsehoods: http://bit.ly/voIlA
  8. @AKGovSarahPalin I had to change out of my white linen suit into something black to suit my mood. Please reconsider—America needs you.
  9. And now, in preparation for this weekend, I must go purchase some fireworks from people who are less fortunate than I.
  10. The good news: Christopher Frizzelle jumped off the side of a mountain. The bad news: He lived. http://bit.ly/9ZncC
  11. A rare bit of pleasant news from Mr. Savage! http://bit.ly/fjkIv Congratulations to Ms. Pedersen and her husband!
  12. Precisely when did they start making telephones without cords?
  13. @AKGovSarahPalin Dearest Sarah: I have experience with hacks. I hope you sue that two-bit fashion rag out of business! http://bit.ly/gpkUJ
  14. @NormGregory Senator Coleman won't take this sitting down. If Dan Savage is for it, decent Americans are against it: http://bit.ly/sGLX8
  15. @theblogblog But why? I have no particular love for the Irish, nor them for me.
  16. Reading Wednesday's paper for my critical overview. What is the opposite of "a treat?" That is what Stranger readers are in for this week.
  17. David Schmader watches a filthy pornographic film (based on the worst smut-book ever written) and loves the credits. http://bit.ly/sVUlc
  18. Dear Readers: I apologize for that ugliness. My assistant just informed me that those remarks were public. It will not happen again.
  19. @paulconstant Enough! I will have my barristers peruse your Twats. If "it" refers to what I believe it does, you will stand trial for libel!
  20. @paulconstant I do not make a habit of threatening the obese and mentally handicapped, but if you persist, I will make an exception.