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StephenColbert

  1. @StephenAtHome You may be me at home, but I'm me on the Internets! Which is the real me? (I think it's me).about 18 hours ago from web
  2. Intellectuals beware! Education is for people who love books, but hate America!about 22 hours ago from web
  3. The amount of twitter followers is directly proportional to to your patriotic manliness.1:34 PM Jul 12th from web
  4. Remember kids! In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant.7:20 PM May 13th, 2007 from web
  5. Isn’t an agnostic just an atheist without balls?5:32 PM May 10th, 2007 from web
  6. There's nothing wrong with stretching the Truth. We stretch taffy, and that just makes it more delicious.9:55 AM May 8th, 2007 from web
  7. Like any good newsman, I believe that if you're not scared, I'm not doing my job.12:00 AM May 1st, 2007 from web
  8. Hey, America, are you thinking what I'm thinking? You soon will be.10:51 AM Apr 30th, 2007 from web
  9. When life gets you down don't get mad, get Stephen2:45 PM Apr 26th, 2007 from web
  10. How many roads must a man walk down before he is run over by an eighteen-wheeler of truth?1:07 PM Apr 26th, 2007 from web
  11. The pen is mightier than the sword, if you shoot that pen out of a gun.11:19 PM Apr 22nd, 2007 from web
  12. Viewers of this show unite! You have nothing to lose but the facts.5:33 PM Apr 19th, 2007 from web
  13. The world is a dirty place, and I am America's lemon-scented wetnap.7:21 PM Apr 18th, 2007 from web
  14. Is that Truth in my pocket, or am I just happy to see you?12:41 AM Apr 17th, 2007 from web
  15. Guess what: The E in E-Mail...stands for 'E-Mail'.1:46 AM Apr 16th, 2007 from web
  16. A, E, I, O, U, and sometimes Y? Consonant or vowel? Make up your mind, we're at war.12:47 AM Apr 14th, 2007 from web
  17. Librarians are hiding something.10:21 PM Apr 11th, 2007 from web
  18. Giving a fly glasses is like giving a bear nunchucks.2:20 PM Apr 7th, 2007 from web
  19. Who's buried in Grants Tomb? Give up? I hope the police have too.11:41 AM Apr 6th, 2007 from web
  20. Nation, it's time to grab the bull by the horns. If there are no horns --you're grabbing a cow, STOP IT!1:00 PM Apr 5th, 2007 from web