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snplgal

  1. The Secret Life of Beef #cowfilms5:57 PM Nov 4th from web
  2. Lost In Rumination #cowfilms5:54 PM Nov 4th from mobile web
  3. @joannacez My favorite: Seabrisket.12:07 PM Nov 4th from mobile web
  4. Phew. Dog fart does not = air freshener.8:01 PM Nov 1st from mobile web
  5. Dude, your balls are totally sewn on tight. You can let go and they won't even roll away.6:27 PM Nov 1st from mobile web
  6. @joannacez Awww. We should all have your problems.7:39 PM Oct 20th from mobile web
  7. @finslippy Fa-lap ballchange, shu-FULL ballchange, shuffle HEEL, shuffle HEEL! If you can say it you can tap it.8:14 PM Oct 6th from web
  8. @sub_english the jury is still out! See previous tweet.8:12 PM Oct 6th from web
  9. ..... and the girlfriend is keeping him on a VERY short leash. Calling and texting REALLY often.8:11 PM Oct 6th from web
  10. Two months into high school and the boy has a girlfriend.6:33 PM Oct 6th from mobile web
  11. Came home to find the cat tossing her own salad on the roof for all the neighbors to see.6:47 PM Oct 4th from mobile web
  12. RT @hotdogsladies A diabetes of teens waddles by, ladled like warm sausage gravy into a corduroy cricket of hella giant clown pants.4:08 PM Oct 4th from mobile web
  13. pRT @Phyllisstein Another icy Chicago autumn. Today's forecast: cloudy with a chance of shrunkballs. about11:43 AM Sep 30th from mobile web
  14. @dooce I feel your SHINGLES pain. Currently I am covered w/ poison oak blisters.6:51 PM Sep 22nd from mobile web
  15. @sub_english the lemon meringue mask comes highly recommended.8:38 PM Sep 18th from mobile web
  16. New Vonage ad makes me uncomfortable.9:01 PM Sep 14th from mobile web
  17. @Remiel God there is NOTHING sexier than a man who can use priapism properly in a tweet!9:12 PM Sep 11th from mobile web
  18. Anything you order that contains the words 1/2 lb and burrito probs a bad idea.8:19 PM Sep 11th from mobile web
  19. You say pee-zometer, I say pie-zometer.3:01 PM Aug 31st from mobile web
  20. Mister, I'd be pissy too if my parents named me Cornelius.10:09 AM Aug 29th from mobile web