sniffyjenkins
- @cleversimon @indefensible Hey, guys, we have a commonwealth club you can join if you like AND our Prime Minister is...oh, wait.about 4 hours ago from TweetDeck
- Success with the 'tying cherry stalk in knot with tongue' thing. Not sure whether the resulting Heimlich manoeuvre spoiled the mood though.5:04 AM Jul 10th from TweetDeck
- Herbal tea tastes so much better when it's coffee.4:22 AM Jul 9th from TweetDeck
- A bird in the hand will probably be extremely frightened by its recent capture & shit on your palm as a result. #literalwisdom1:38 AM Jul 9th from TweetDeck
- @califmom Hey, Happy Birthday! Champagne for breakfast! Oh wait, you've not gone to bed yet? OK, just champagne, then. Enjoy!12:43 AM Jul 9th from TweetDeck in reply to califmom
- IRL?
More like IRHELL, amirite?8:22 AM Jul 8th from Birdhouse
- @redrabbit Big hugs, rabbit. Thinking of you.5:29 AM Jul 8th from TweetDeck in reply to redrabbit
- Pro tip: never make major life decisions, like what to wear to work, before you've had at least two cups of coffee. Related: gold hotpants.1:09 AM Jul 8th from TweetDeck
- Today the role of sniffyjenkins will be played by a tired, scruffy hobo. Oh, she's just dropped a stack of files too. She's so method.3:02 AM Jul 3rd from TweetDeck
- @indefensible I shall ensure I use the phrase 'turd-gargler' at least once today. I'm sure my mum won't mind...5:22 AM Jul 2nd from TweetDeck in reply to indefensible
- The insomnia is coming from INSIDE the bed...9:21 PM Jul 1st from Birdhouse
- I just called The Boss 'Babycakes'. I'm not sure that even those 3 double espressos can account for that. Anyone know of a good therapist?3:32 AM Jul 1st from TweetDeck
- Any meme will do.6:11 AM Jun 30th from Birdfeed
- If at first you don't succeed, fall to the floor & shriek.
Lady, don't judge me: it worked for your kid & all I want is one of his M&Ms.4:35 AM Jun 29th from Birdhouse
- Colleague. The only excuse for smelling that bad is being a 14-year old boy without a nose. You do not have that excuse. Prepare to die.6:22 AM Jun 26th from TweetDeck
- Happy birthday @secretsquirrel, mate! I made you sumfink: http://bit.ly/11PDhi4:18 AM Jun 25th from TweetDeck
- GPOYW, hiding from lions and tigers and bears, oh my: http://bit.ly/JGuLG10:38 AM Jun 24th from TweetDeck
- Oh, iPhone. You know the names of 3 new anti-psychotic medications but still can't deal with my favourite expletive. You're a ducking idiot.5:18 AM Jun 24th from TweetDeck
- Banana gun battle3:03 AM Jun 24th from TweetDeck
- You say I'm punching above my weight, Sir? Well, I say I'm...actually I'm just going to let this punch below the belt do the talking for me.8:24 AM Jun 23rd from TweetDeck
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