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smithee_awards

  1. If it weren't for inane dialog, this would be a silent movie.
  2. And, of course, the fate of the heroes depends on Shaq making a basket. Who'd have seen that coming?
  3. You haven't lived until you've seen Shaq play live-action Frogger with a bad guy in a rail yard.
  4. As a basketball player, Shaq is very, very good. As an actor, Shaq is very, very... tall.
  5. "2020 Texas Gladiators" has one jawdropping "I can't believe they went there" moment. It made us ask, "how?"
  6. Speargun suicide! "Amsterblam!"
  7. Evil psychiatrist looks too smooth to be the killer. "Amsterbland!"
  8. Detective's love interest is in peril! "Amsterdamsel!"
  9. Having a tiny little glass of sherry. An "Amsterdram!"
  10. Awesome boat chase through canal, ending in a huge crash & explosion. "Amsterammed!"
  11. Interrogation in a darkened room. "Amsterdimmed!"
  12. Ooh. Salvation Army lady is looting her own poorbox near the canal. She's "Amsterdoomed!"
  13. Bodies are turning up all over the canals. "Amsterdumped!"
  14. The killer IS a guy in SCUBA gear! We thought it was some kind of aquatic monster.
  15. Scuba diving in the canals? "Amsterdamp!"
  16. Movie for tonight: "Amsterdamned!"
  17. Dinner and a Smithee at #ypsicornerbrewery ! Tonight! Right now actually...
  18. wow ...
  19. backwater Mississauga, specifically
  20. They needed to get away from civilization ... so they went to Canada!