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smearcampaign

  1. "...results in a rush of confidence, hyperalertness and sexiness that lasts for hours on end." Crystal meth, or Wheel of Fortune?
  2. I Don't Know How To Lie
  3. Cops and cab drivers are douche bags!
  4. They say she died of a lonely twat.
  5. Need AAA batteries. Night. Ruined. #moodkilled
  6. So inspired by @damfunk
  7. Scream! You've Got Mail.
  8. There are more white dreads here than I've seen in a minute.
  9. My spirit animal is a mumu
  10. I put the ho in hobo.
  11. A young man claiming to have just graduated from college asked me, who is the governer of Austin? Nice.
  12. When the mom's away the tweets will play!!
  13. Mona Lisa Bootleg: out dis spring
  14. Pilgrims Get Jealous
  15. 2012, count me out. John Cusack, go back to your record shop. - Pete
  16. I'm gonna get in those Wrangler Retro Jeans.
  17. WE WANT A CLUBHOUSE!!!
  18. Just finished a handle of bacon vodka.
  19. Hold me tighter giant lizard.
  20. If you act like a toddler, I'm gonna lock you in the attic like a toddler.