sarkastickunt
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If sexual frustration is the new black, then I'm a pair of Doc Martens, and charcoal smudged eyes away from completing my goth look.
18 minutes ago
from Tumblr
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My head feels like a drum being played from the inside, and I'm more of an acoustic guitar kinda girl.
about 1 hour ago
from Tumblr
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Twetes wyth tipos driive me insain.
about 13 hours ago
from TwitterBerry
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If you have a sex addiction you want cured, just get yourself some kids and a dead beat husband. You can kiss sex goodbye after that.
about 17 hours ago
from web
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I have enough extra skin on my belly to make myself a new pair of boots AND a belt. Fellas?
about 18 hours ago
from web
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I canceled my dentist appointment today and now my tooth hurts. Coincidence? Or proof that my vagina isn't the only body part that hates me.
about 18 hours ago
from web
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This day needs more chip and less dips.
about 21 hours ago
from Tumblr
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This week, I have a date with a 23 pound turkey. Just like when I was in high school.
7:09 AM Nov 23rd
from Tumblr
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My Christmas Wish List - I am just EXHAUSTED when I think of December 25th. My heart hurts. My brain is on...
6:58 AM Nov 23rd
from Tumblr
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You know that feeling of euphoria you get every morning from being excited to face a brand new day? Me neither.
4:41 AM Nov 23rd
from TwitterBerry
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I'm watching a holiday movie starring Mario Lopez. All the drugs I did in the 90's might have caused more damage than I first suspected.
6:07 PM Nov 22nd
from Tumblr
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Condoms come in 3 sizes. Large, Average, and OH GOD PLEASE LET HER VAGINA BE SHALLOW.
4:32 PM Nov 22nd
from web
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If there's such a thing as a potato chip coma, I'm about to go level one trauma in this bitch.
4:06 PM Nov 22nd
from web
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Dead men may not tell tales, but brain dead females from Facebook never shut the hell up.
3:42 PM Nov 22nd
from Tumblr
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Live tweeting a football game is as interesting as play by plays from a dental appointment.
1:13 PM Nov 22nd
from Tumblr
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My waistline went out to get cigarettes one night and never came home.
12:13 PM Nov 22nd
from Tumblr
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Hiccups are a lot easier to do than pushups.
10:15 AM Nov 22nd
from TwitterBerry
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I suspect it would be easier to find Paris Hilton's dignity than it would be to find the motivation I need to get out of bed.
7:40 AM Nov 22nd
from web
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If our worth is measured by how much we weigh, I'm completely invaluable.
6:01 AM Nov 22nd
from TwitterBerry
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Myspace: the only place where cell phone pics of your ass can be in the same folder as pics from your son's first birthday.
7:34 PM Nov 21st
from TwitterBerry
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- Name ms. diagnosed
- Location Slowly going out of my mind.
- Web http://sarkastick...
- Bio Mother, daughter, carnivore, social drunk, shit talker, flirt and procrastinator du jour
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