samhey
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Not just saying because of the cocktails: this year I'm also thankful for all 'yall. Happy gobble.
about 3 hours ago
from Power Twitter
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Whenever I call home from work it's like I'm beaming down to some planet in mid-annihilation.
about 6 hours ago
from Birdhouse
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I dreaMED A DREAM OF TIMES GONE BYYYY /
when music wAS MORE THAN DUDES KISSINNGGG
about 10 hours ago
from Birdhouse
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I'll give my mother-in-law this: she wears her Movember well.
6:47 PM Nov 24th
from Birdhouse
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Man, that bris hit the spot.
12:21 PM Nov 24th
from Birdfeed
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In addition to his toots, @ has been AMAZING with recent 'default-twitter'-shaped avatars. Troll his stream for them. Truly beautiful.
10:13 PM Nov 23rd
from Power Twitter
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Exclamation points are the skid marks of the internet.
5:22 PM Nov 23rd
from web
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My mother-in-law is like Yoda, except without any Jedi powers or wisdom.
10:22 AM Nov 23rd
from Birdhouse
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I buy a new leotard for the Sarah Palin workout video, and two reps into the 'mooseskinner' I go and sprain my dignity. That crafty bitch.
2:56 PM Nov 22nd
from Birdhouse
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Today we sing pancake songs.
8:29 AM Nov 22nd
from Birdfeed
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After convincing daughter to wear clean star underwear instead of dirty moon ones, I'm ready to bring peace to the middle east.
12:46 PM Nov 21st
from Birdhouse
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Through sing-alongs and science fairs, they WILL DESTROY US.
7:49 PM Nov 20th
from web
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@ don't worry. Your mom is my constant.
3:16 PM Nov 20th
from Birdfeed
in reply to tj
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I just went all Daniel Faraday on that plate of tacos.
2:11 PM Nov 20th
from Birdhouse
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Hello fat jeans my old friend
I've come to walk with you again
7:33 AM Nov 20th
from web
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First of all, It's called "the Shocker," doctor. And no, I guess I didn't really think through how the goat might react.
5:37 PM Nov 19th
from Birdhouse
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What is the appropriate nickname for a butt afro? I'm asking for my butt.
2:00 PM Nov 19th
from Birdhouse
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Most raisins aint sweet as grapes but DAMN your grandmomma FINE, girl
3:59 PM Nov 18th
from Birdhouse
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I'll wager $1800 that Alex Trebek's manscaping is superb.
8:12 AM Nov 18th
from Birdhouse
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Having a mirror that looks like an iPhone means they think I'm working as I caress the reflection of my lips for 30 minutes.
5:28 PM Nov 17th
from Birdhouse
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