remember, there's only one way to improve your body language, you need a body.

Wake me up early tomorrow morning,ok? Ok. Just don't forget to wake me up first, so i can wake you up.

Hey i know you're famous, but that doesn't mean i don't know you.

In a blink of an eye I fell asleep. That blink was longer than i thought.

yes dear waiter, i waved my hand to you just to let you know which person is to be ignored while you were busy texting.

Long story short, that's it.

Hello,what's that noise? I't the rain. Damn it rain,get off the phone!!

I just hope Monday is away for the weekend.

Can you hear me?? No,it's too dark!

Him:"are you a dog person or a cat person?" Me:"I'm a human person"

When favstar down, oxygen mask should fall from the ceiling. LOLJK! Bacon should fall from the ceiling.

I'm too lazy to yawn.hold me.

@Benn_Dover Whoa! Welcome back! :D

@cessperience thank you for TOTD :) favstar.fm/t/111251389350…

Having cereal and choco milk :) SHIT! Wrong account.

"Internet connection failed, hit any users to continue"

I just stole the wrong type of a tweet. I feel dirty.

@sucittaM you are gonna feel like shit tomorrow, you handsome motherfucker.

Please tell me, where is the "hide facebook" button on Facebook?

Whenever "not tweeting as much" become a thing, do let me know. I'm game.