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riebschlager

  1. Retirement is wasted on the old.about 10 hours ago from web
  2. 30% of my memory is filled with sarcastic rejoinders to questions no one will ever ask me.1:55 PM Jul 2nd from TweetDeck
  3. @abigvictory Racist!1:43 PM Jul 2nd from TweetDeck in reply to abigvictory
  4. Could God make a meme so popular that even he got annoyed by it?8:13 AM Jul 2nd from TweetDeck
  5. If Canada Day is anything like the 4th of July, emergency rooms should be filling up with drunk, sunburned rednecks who smell of gun powder.8:18 PM Jul 1st from web
  6. @rosygirl It's THE FUTURE! You can totally do that now!3:33 PM Jul 1st from web in reply to rosygirl
  7. FREE Ad Agency Meeting Template: Hey! We have a SUPER-hot job for [client_name] that's due [todays_date + 3]. [10 minutes of obfuscation]9:50 AM Jul 1st from TweetDeck
  8. @CranberryPerson IRLunch8:22 AM Jul 1st from web in reply to CranberryPerson
  9. To the driver of the Smart Car with the Kansas license plate DUMBCAR: We should hang out.8:07 AM Jul 1st from TweetDeck
  10. I'm completely incapable of feigning a laugh. This is probably why I'm not very successful.7:45 AM Jul 1st from TweetDeck
  11. I'm just not feeling very funny today. I wonder if Dane Cook ever feels that way. Oh god, what am I saying? Of course he doesn't.1:49 PM Jun 30th from TweetDeck
  12. With Twitter, it's often more about what you *don't* tweet. For instance, this tweet. I should not have posted this. It is not funny.11:25 AM Jun 30th from TweetDeck
  13. I included a 'guess who has two thumbs' joke in an email to my girlfriend. I'm guessing this is why I haven't heard back from her all day.2:41 PM Jun 29th from web
  14. "Oh, you're from Nebraska? Do you know Bob Smith?" "You're assuming that since we're from the same state...wait, BOB Smith? Yes."8:28 AM Jun 29th from web
  15. I climbed up on my roof and nudged the sun away from the earth with a stick, so it should be cooling off here in a bit.11:40 AM Jun 27th from TweetDeck
  16. I wonder how many coffee shops opened as a direct result of someone thinking of a great new coffee-related pun.11:16 PM Jun 26th from TweetDeck
  17. Ugh, Indian for lunch is never a good idea. If I wanted to pay $10 just to end up feeling sleepy and regretful then I'd just...nevermind.11:34 AM Jun 26th from web
  18. I don't feel I'm being selfish when I say that my kickball team losing our tournament is the worst thing that happened today.9:20 PM Jun 25th from TweetDeck
  19. I just flew in from Argentina and boy are my arms having an affair.11:12 AM Jun 25th from TweetDeck
  20. Pro Tip: The 'cookies' on the counter are actually dog treats.4:15 AM Jun 25th from TweetDeck
  • Name Chris Riebschlager
  • Location Kansas City, Missouri
  • Web http://www.the816...
  • Bio I am on the internet.
107 Following 605 Followers
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