restaurantgirl
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If sex burns calories why do the men I date carve notches in their belt afterward? Are we doing it wrong?
about 23 hours ago
from web
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I love Toys for Tots, especially Mr. Potato Head.
6:47 AM Dec 22nd
from txt
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What's the point of buying a cake if it's just going to be stollen?
8:41 AM Dec 21st
from txt
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Churned them out so fast they should be called EZ Pass Cookies.
7:08 PM Dec 18th
from web
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What do you call a sensitive baker? A ginger bread man.
6:48 AM Dec 18th
from web
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Surprised not to find Peaches Geldof at Le Caprice but waiter suggested their puddings are better than any tart.
5:23 PM Dec 17th
from web
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First time in a prep kitchen. I expected more madras.
12:20 PM Dec 16th
from web
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Gourmet fit in my mailbox just fine when it was rolled up. Since they decided to fold it, I haven't gotten any.
12:40 PM Dec 15th
from web
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If you want tighter clothes, chocolate makes an excellent vice.
11:46 AM Dec 15th
from web
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First look at my book, coming out 9/22/10, now on presale in Canada:
8:24 AM Dec 15th
from web
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I always confuse Chanukah and Passover, I never remember when the C is silent and when it's parted.
12:37 PM Dec 11th
from web
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Mom said I'm turning kitchen into a locker room, but I'm just making potato pancakes.
7:50 AM Dec 11th
from web
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If I order my steak Pittsburgh, shouldn't it be black and yellow?
7:27 PM Dec 10th
from web
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Guys who only ever ask girls for a taste of brown sugar are missing something super fine.
12:59 PM Dec 8th
from web
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Isn't bouche de Noel what you do under mistletoe?
8:58 AM Dec 8th
from web
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If a shake is responsible for 9/11, imagine what a sundae could have done!
8:58 AM Dec 7th
from web
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Peanut butter is always better with crackers. Probably because so many of them are peanut farmers.
10:24 AM Dec 4th
from web
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Usually it's hands-off but when she screws up mom lets me eat the irrugelachs.
12:30 PM Dec 3rd
from web
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I love to eat pig tails. The doctors call it trichophagia.
10:49 AM Dec 3rd
from txt
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Why are Advent calendars full of chocolate but Jewish calendars only contain dates?
9:04 AM Dec 3rd
from web
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- Name Danyelle Freeman
- Location New York
- Web http://www.thelif...
- Bio This Twitter is an unaffiliated parody of Danyelle Freeman, the real Restaurant Girl who can be found at restaurantgirl.com. She's not this clever or ambitious.
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