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rejectedjokes

  1. People from Russia must think our dolls are so boring. 5:06 PM Oct 24th from web
  2. In honor of Halloween and Saw VI, here is the most fucked up short I've ever done, TEDDY SAW- http://tinyurl.com/yz6okor 8:50 AM Oct 23rd from web
  3. This picture annoys me so much. It somehow makes me hate the idea of birds with super strength.- http://twitpic.com/mhuu2 11:40 AM Oct 22nd from web
  4. Mr. Peanut is like a classy Frosty the Snowman. If you take off his hat, he turns into peanut butter. 10:15 AM Oct 21st from web
  5. If my calculations are correct on 11/9 terrorists are going to build two enormous buildings in NYC. 6:09 PM Oct 20th from web
  6. Today I'm ending all of my stories with..."and that man became, THE NAKED COWBOY!" 11:40 AM Oct 19th from web
  7. Shitty Jobs tonight- UCBLA at 11pm! Me, @dcpierson, @DonGlover, @dominicdierkes, @seanclements, @erockappel! 3:42 PM Oct 18th from web
  8. http://twitpic.com/lziae - And then god said let there be cinema...and all was well. 9:35 PM Oct 17th from TwitPic
  9. Neo's an idiot. If he took the blue pill he would have had UNLIMITED WISHES! 3:47 PM Oct 17th from web
  10. If I was a daddy long legs, I would flaunt it more. 5:21 PM Oct 16th from web
  11. Why do clowns wear targets on their noses if they don't want me to punch them? 4:19 PM Oct 15th from web
  12. I saw a pigeon having sex with a Bulldog this morning and obnoxiously owning it. I forget, is that good or bad luck? 8:27 AM Oct 14th from web
  13. http://twitpic.com/ldswm - The ad that popped up on @sarahksilverman's short about selling the vatican to save the world. 9:03 AM Oct 13th from TwitPic
  14. I poured salt on a snail, watched it die, poured pepper on its carcass and watched it come back to life twice as strong. 8:47 AM Oct 12th from web
  15. Shitty Jobs tonight at 11pm at UCBLA w/ me, Derrick (Don, Dom, DC), Clements, Sanders $5 tix- http://tinyurl.com/ykswvn9 8:33 AM Oct 11th from web
  16. Snake while shedding- "NO, NO, NO! Great, now I look like a fucking idiot! Why shed clean when I travel on mostly dirt?" 7:03 PM Oct 10th from web
  17. Wait, I'm confused. The Dalai Lama is not a ninja? Start from the beginning. 1:30 PM Oct 9th from web
  18. Dear the flu, without you I wouldn't be able to sweat in a 70 degree room. I wouldn't be able to stumble while I walk. Thank you. 12:05 PM Oct 8th from web
  19. Hypercolor condoms...genius or disgusting? 2:09 PM Oct 7th from web
  20. What are the absolute BEST movies to put in 3D? Right now at the top of my list is The Visitor. 4:31 PM Oct 6th from web