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raypruit

  1. todays the only day i splurge on bottles of bud instead of cans. theyre called bottle rockets for a reason. plus its harder to aim with cans
  2. Trying to come up with possible band names that EW or RS wont be able to use as a pun in the headline of their negative review of my album.
  3. It's weird to think that someone I used to jerk off to is now dead. And let's not forget about Farrah Fawcett either.
  4. @sportsguy33 who is the bigger choke artist Ricky Barnes or Mike Barnes?
  5. Just Tim McGraw's new cologne. It smells like Kodiak and Propecia. The line starts here, ladies!
  6. Not ashamed to admit that I wanna beat the shit outta this kid. His dad HAD to of walked out on the fam after this http://tinyurl.com/5z5kk8
  7. Joe Buck is a lamer version of Brandon Walsh. Or the mormon QB that dated my ex. What a nerd. I bet hes always the designated driver.
  8. just found out i'm getting a raise! now i can finally afford to buy the $5 scratch offs.
  9. Sometimes i wish that Fergie was my girlfriend. Just so she'd "accidentally" fall down a fucking flight of stairs.
  10. just found out that phil collins isnt singing "she seems to have a physical attraction" but an "invisible touch." i need a drink.
  11. yeah lady, i didnt pull over to help u to fix ur flat, just to rape you. in broad daylite. with u holding a tire iron. get over yourself.
  12. Does anyone know if there is something wrong with Netzero's dialup connection? I'm having trouble getting online.
  13. If jon wants kate to lose the 'tude he needs to add a flight of stairs to the equation.
  14. People who fill their fountain cup with soda, take a big sip then refill the cup again b4 paying, make the rest of us poor people look bad.
  15. The reason that guy didn't win American Idol isn't because he's gay. It's because he's the HOST OF THE SHOW. HE'S NOT ALLOWED TO WIN! duh.
  16. Why do fast food places write shit on their cups and wrappers and try to be funny? Leave the comedy to the experts. Like Robin Williams.
  17. Got a big box of wine for my mom for Sunday, just like I do every week. Her mothers day gift is that I'll let her drink it all in 1 sitting.
  18. @robhuebel you're doing it wrong. you're supposed to throw WOMEN down the stairs, not yourself. but don't forget to say it was an accident.
  19. Im back. U know how u cant get a DUI during the daytime? well thats bullshit. TRUST ME.
  20. Being hungover for work pretty much makes fridays worse than mondays.