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  1. All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. Charles M. Schulz 2:26 PM Oct 27th from API
  2. A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. Bill Cosby 2:16 PM Oct 27th from API
  3. Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. - Will Rogers 2:07 PM Oct 27th from API
  4. Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife. - Shelley Winters 2:02 PM Oct 27th from API
  5. In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on. - Robert Frost 1:55 PM Oct 27th from API
  6. To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior'. - Rita Rudner 1:48 PM Oct 27th from API
  7. I don't need you to remind me of my age. I have a bladder to do that for me. Stephen Fry 1:39 PM Oct 27th from API
  8. Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory. - Robert Benchley 1:32 PM Oct 27th from API
  9. From a worldly point of view, there is no mistake so great as that of being always right. - Samuel Butler 1:22 PM Oct 27th from API
  10. Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. George Burns 1:13 PM Oct 27th from API
  11. Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company. Mark Twain 1:08 PM Oct 27th from API
  12. Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of. - Kathy Lette 1:00 PM Oct 27th from API
  13. A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. Bill Cosby 12:52 PM Oct 27th from API
  14. You can be young without money but you can't be old without it. - Tennessee Williams 12:47 PM Oct 27th from API
  15. Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes. - Oscar Wilde 12:38 PM Oct 27th from API
  16. I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them. - George Bush 12:29 PM Oct 27th from API
  17. We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police. - Jeff Marder 12:23 PM Oct 27th from API
  18. A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. - Anonymous 12:17 PM Oct 27th from API
  19. The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do. 12:11 PM Oct 27th from API
  20. Suburban husband asked his wife Y they never had money:"It's the neighbors, dear. They're always buying things we can't afford." W Winchell 12:01 PM Oct 27th from API