philjeffs
-
RT myself, because I made myself laugh: Susan Boyle looks like she's fashioned from a block of hairy clay.
about 6 hours ago
from Tweetie
-
@ Susan Boyle looks like she's fashioned from a block of hairy clay.
about 7 hours ago
from Tweetie
in reply to jimneath
-
@ I like will young because of is fat tongue and massive jaw.
about 9 hours ago
from Tweetie
in reply to Bobby2scoops
-
@ I like them because of Dappy and his bazzin' wooly hats.
about 9 hours ago
from Tweetie
in reply to Bobby2scoops
-
The toilet on this train just came alarmingly close to sloshing piss all over my leg.
about 10 hours ago
from Tweetie
-
Just paid £10 for Wifi on the train to London because @ fucked up my iPhone tethering bundle when I upgraded to 3GS. And I'm tired.
about 19 hours ago
from Tweetie
-
Jaws 2 isn't that good.
11:20 AM Nov 22nd
from Tweetie
-
@ Yeah. That's too close.
12:14 PM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
in reply to 13twelve
-
Look at Pudsey Bear playing that guitar. He has no fingers! He's just making the disabled kids look lazy. If he can make it, so can they.
11:18 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
-
To be fair, Fireman Sam's got a pretty good voice.
11:16 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
-
@ We'll look dead fit.
11:14 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
in reply to Bobby2scoops
-
@ Harry Potter just asked me for money, surrounded by a load of cross eyed urchins. Where's my credit card?
11:14 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
in reply to jimneath
-
Oh great, Fat Heather and the rest of Eastenders are doing a Motown medley later on. Why don't they just tell me my mum doesn't love me?
11:11 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
-
In the 70s, TV was like Children in Need every night of the week. Variety may be the spice of life, but on television, it makes be gip.
11:08 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
-
If you're going to sail your fucking yacht near rocket launcher wielding pirates, expect to get boarded. This country.
11:04 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
-
@ I'll start some rumours about the immense size of your genitals.
10:58 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
in reply to surfsocialmedia
-
@ Ben. That was then and this is now. Welcome to big school.
10:51 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
in reply to surfsocialmedia
-
Anyone wearing a t-shirt with a tie printed on the front should be fired into the sun in a rocket full of dickheads.
10:05 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
-
@ I tried it once then threw it in the bin. I felt dirty like a crackhead prostitute in Lidl.
9:58 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
in reply to surfsocialmedia
-
@ No BT, he is not. His couscous is an abomination.
9:54 AM Nov 20th
from Tweetie
in reply to surfsocialmedia
|
- Name Phil Jeffs
- Location iPhone: 53.484018,-2.234423
- Web http://madebyfudg...
- Bio Technology Director & Partner at Fudge.
|
