pandashark
-
Listening to Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros on headphones while watching Cops on the telly is mighty jarring, I've gotta say. Scared.
12:05 AM Dec 22nd
from web
-
But really, I just need to go to a super amazing show soon. The last good show I saw was like a month ago. My depression is depressed.
8:38 PM Dec 20th
from web
-
Denver sucks a little hard right now. Having annoying dreams of moving in with family in NYC and shamelessly living off them for a while.
8:36 PM Dec 20th
from web
-
And good for me too: "Sex anything??? And nudity?!!! Hell yes!" Warning to parents: your kids will likely disappoint you.
8:30 PM Dec 20th
from web
-
Glad the fucking MPAA now puts reasons for ratings on movies. Makes Xmas shopping for my parents way easier. "Sex anything? That's a no."
8:26 PM Dec 20th
from web
-
Bought my puppy his 1000th toy this weekend (a green lobster he adores). Love spending money on him; doesn't bode well for my having kids.
8:17 PM Dec 20th
from web
-
Also, I have the most ridiculously expensive taste for a poor that I've ever seen. Eeek, awful. Could use drugs of some sort right now.
8:15 PM Dec 20th
from web
-
Bought only 2 out of 8 gifts this weekend after countless hours of terrible mall time. Hate shopping. Head hurts. Maybe want to die.
8:13 PM Dec 20th
from web
-
But, pro: getting hit on by lesbian delivery chick who calls me cute pet names and compliments my vampire skin. Purrrrrrrr.
8:53 PM Dec 15th
from web
-
But, hazard: getting hit on by weird and/or boring delivery guys. Them: How ya doin? Me: Fine. Them: Well, I can SEE that! Me: Meh.
8:49 PM Dec 15th
from web
-
Pros of receptionisting: Being referred to as "that cute young thing" and being told I'm the nicest receptionista in town. Purrrrrrrrrrr.
8:42 PM Dec 15th
from web
-
Hazards of receptionisting: Lustfully gazing at Harry & David catalogs and thinking a pear basket would be like the best xmas gift eeeever.
8:39 PM Dec 15th
from web
-
Yeah, I think people need to start calling me SWOWW. That'd be totally cool, right?
5:24 PM Dec 13th
from web
-
You know, I've got 101 problems and bitches account for roughly two of them.
4:33 PM Dec 13th
from web
-
Borrowing from my hero, Tao: Kinda afraid to read my last few tweets. Feel like I'd feel 'really' bad about myself if I did.
11:04 PM Dec 10th
from web
-
Great, y'all think I'm like the Grinch AND disturbed or something. Grumble grumble. Did I mention @ is slipping me weird pills???
10:54 PM Dec 10th
from web
-
And by "sleeping pill" I of course meant "poison." Speaking of, what if boob implants were made of poison? Exciting, right?
10:52 PM Dec 10th
from web
-
@ just slipped something into my drink! Oh, it was just a sleeping pill...so he can silence me and beat me at Twitter! Noooo...snooze.
10:44 PM Dec 10th
from web
-
50 tweets?! Holy shit! I feel like I really might die die the death death (what can I say? Words are my specialty).
10:39 PM Dec 10th
from web
-
And anyone who would feel the need to write my last tweet is probably a loser...fuuuuck me (and not in the sexy way either. Everyone loses!)
10:35 PM Dec 10th
from web
|
|