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nutgraph

  1. When Lucas "enhanced" Star Wars, he said it wasn't finished the first time. Does that mean Howard the Duck was a flawless masterpiece?
  2. It's odd that Dorothy & pals had to get a mani/pedi before meeting the Wizard of Oz. Does the White House do that before you meet w/ Obama?
  3. Regardless of the reason, I never feel like a bigger dork than when I look up something like "Wu-Tang Clan" on Wikipedia.
  4. I have never understood the desire for fame/notoriety. The idea is abhorrent to me for many reasons, like this: http://twitpic.com/slj7d
  5. Can I get a TomTom GPS voice mod that mimics a wife/girlfriend? I'm accustomed to being nagged when I miss a turn.
  6. Mayan calendar ends at 2012? Big deal! How far ahead does YOUR date planner go? My old Apple Newton ends at 2010! Who ya gonna believe?
  7. Friend joined the Flying Saucer's beer club. For gender, he chk'd Male. I secretly chk'd Female & added "(Tranny)." I'm such a 5-yr-old.
  8. @britwoollard Supposedly, it's an anti-Muslim thing. I think it's just because minarets would look odd on those packets of instant cocoa.
  9. The Swiss have officially banned minarets. Soon, they'll be banning all spires & towers. How will I find the enchanted sleeping princess?
  10. "I think I will have another Mountain Dew" is not something you need to Tweet. Then again, neither was this criticism. Damn you!
  11. No, goyim. A place is reserved for Elijah at Passover, not Thanksgiving. He doesn't just show up uninvited to every meal. That's my job.
  12. @poobou What I wouldn't give to be able to send your phone a loud scream right now. ;) Happy Things 'n' Stuff, mi amiga!
  13. To everyone out there who's giving thanks for me, I'd just like to say, "You're welcome!" (Good manners cost nothing.)
  14. "Scanners" is a great movie, from an era when you had to be wearing a lab coat to work on a computer. I still wear one, out of habit.
  15. The rules for numbers below ten do not apply to 6. He is not a number, he is a free man. (via @FakeAPStylebook)
  16. @britwoollard You see Cronkite and think of me b/c he was a paragon of journalistic integrity, not b/c he was old, right? RIGHT?!?
  17. Working on a proposal to Hallmark for cards written by R. Lee Ermey. Grandma ill? Ermey says, "Walk it off!" Great for returning soldiers!
  18. People afraid of Cern's Large Hadron Collider are the same people who believe that "2012" is a documentary.
  19. @poobou Yeah I know they're different. But he can't have his kitty bar mitzvah without a bris first! Now don't you feel silly?
  20. Kitty is getting fixed Tuesday. Or, as I prefer to say, it's Charlie's bris. Wonder if the vet would mind having a rabbi there. Volunteers?