notstevenwright
- I have map of the United States, it's actual size. It says one mile = one mile.9:03 AM May 11th from web
- I used to be a narrator for bad mimes.6:04 PM May 10th from web
- How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?5:40 PM Jul 8th, 2008 from web
- The universe is expanding. That should help ease the traffic.10:08 AM Jun 18th, 2008 from web
- A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.1:22 PM May 8th, 2008 from web
- I'm thinking about buying a plasma television in case I need a blood transfusion.6:00 AM Apr 14th, 2008 from web
- I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.5:07 PM Apr 13th, 2008 from web
- I bought a new camera. It's very advanced. You don't even need it.9:42 AM Mar 25th, 2008 from web
- My nephew has HDHDTV -- High Definition Attention Deficit Disorder. He can barely pay attention, but when he does it unbelievably clear.9:32 AM Mar 11th, 2008 from web
- I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.10:09 AM Feb 9th, 2008 from web
- Why are the pictures square if the lens is round?10:44 AM Jan 14th, 2008 from web
- When I get real bored, I drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask if I'm leaving.9:39 AM Nov 28th, 2007 from web
- I have a map of the United States... actual size. It says, "Scale: 1 mile = 1 mile." I spent last summer folding it.7:17 AM Nov 20th, 2007 from web
- Sometimes I... No, I don't.8:17 PM Oct 28th, 2007 from web
- I think it's wrong only one company makes the game Monopoly.1:48 PM Sep 11th, 2007 from web
- I bought a new iPod. It can either hold 5,000 songs or one telephone message from my mother.1:10 PM Aug 30th, 2007 from web
- I'm a peripheral visionary.10:29 PM Aug 13th, 2007 from web
- I have a paper cut from writing my suicide note. It's a start.11:54 AM Aug 9th, 2007 from web
- You know, the earth is bipolar.2:22 PM Aug 8th, 2007 from web
- Is "tired old cliche" one?9:53 PM Aug 7th, 2007 from web
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- Name Fake Steven Wright
- Bio Every day, one quote from me.
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