Profile_bird

Hey there! nickwarren is using Twitter.

Twitter is a free service that lets you keep in touch with people through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What's happening? Join today to start receiving nickwarren's tweets.

Already using Twitter
from your phone? Click here.

nickwarren

  1. "I won't panic", she thought. "So the man of my dreams is married. Not the end of the world. I'll think of it as a project."
  2. "I told him I loved him 10 minutes into the date," she said. "It seemed the easiest way to get rid of him."
  3. "Just water please," he said. "I haven't drunk coke since I read the science. You know... what it does to you, chemically."
  4. "I never truly understood grief until we lost the dog," he said. "That was his last lesson, having already taught me joy, love and loyalty."
  5. "A kiss is not a promise."
  6. I knew we were in the shit before we even reached the car. The trunk was open... and empty. The body was gone.
  7. "I dumped him," she said. "We weren't sexually compatible. He thought 'rich fantasy life' meant imagining he'd won the lottery."
  8. "I AM BLOODY CALM," she screamed.
  9. His life was a library, filled with unfinished books.
  10. "I can't make it," she said. "Jon's so sick he's actually stopped moaning about how ill he feels. That almost never happens."
  11. John Drake was haunted by the faces of his children. They weren't dead, they just never shut up.
  12. "She's demanding a trial separation," he said. "Either I separate from my iPhone, or she leaves me. I'm thinking about it."
  13. "It's not being wrong that matters," he said, "it's looking bloody wrong. That's politics baby."
  14. "10 years ago you had fire in your belly", he said, "Where the fuck is it now? I'll fuckin tell you. You put it out with fucking drink."
  15. The car stood idle. It took them 60 seconds to steal it, 3 minutes to get away, and 3 minutes to find the body in the trunk. A setup.
  16. "God was on another call," she said, "but I left a message on his machine."
  17. "I'm not addicted to the computer," she said. "It's just that outside I feel so disconnected from anything real."
  18. "I've got two options", he said. "Either I lose 7 stone or I just stop talking to thin people. Smug bastards."
  19. True story: At dinner... my 6 year old daughter says, "don't make me come over there and sort you out." Sigh.
  20. England, 2019. CCTV cameras watch empty streets, and each other.