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Maggie
This painter with his perfectly worn and splattered jeans could run them through the wash, and throw them up on eBay for $150. AMERICA!
08:42 AM April 16, 2008
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SusieSunshine
"So expwain to me where the seed goes in you to make a baby." Me: Ummm errrr. Him: "Come on. YOU CAN DO IT!"
09:18 PM March 27, 2008
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SusieSunshine
After a great theological discussion on heaven ("Sooo, it's in another state?") I asked if he had any other questions for me.
09:17 PM March 27, 2008
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jkottke
I'm an optimistic pessimist, a liberal conservative, a relative absolutist, and a laid back worrywart. And deeply confused most of the time.
04:02 PM March 27, 2008
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papernapkin
American cheese is really more "pasteurized product" than anything else. Much like the actual country.
07:48 AM March 27, 2008
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PoppyBuxom
Ready to head into Magic Kingdom. Am going on Finding Nemo ride. Any toddlers who get in my way will be drop-kicked into the lagoon.
09:37 AM March 26, 2008
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dooce
My mother believes that global warming is a hoax. And now I'm afraid to ask her whether or not she believes the Earth is round.
05:38 PM March 23, 2008
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dooce
Last night I dreamt that I tweeted, "I just have a thing for globes." And got hundreds of responses that said, "SO DO I!"
08:37 AM March 23, 2008
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SusieSunshine
If the day I die gets the title of "Good Friday" or Monday or whatever, I'll come back from the dead too, but just to kick some ass.
05:56 PM March 21, 2008
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dooce
Why you should never make assumptions: "Why did you draw a picture of George Bush?" "That's not George Bush, that's Prince Charming."
11:28 AM March 18, 2008
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webgoddess
Overheard by @mstabbycat at her library: "doesn't that just turn your Tutu?"
04:37 PM March 15, 2008
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webgoddess
Just saw myself eating in local commercial. Note to self: stop eating!
08:49 PM March 14, 2008
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webgoddess
Ohhh! I just got a gift idea for @mstabbycat. Wonder how close the Merry Maids are to Higgensville?
09:27 AM March 13, 2008
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papernapkin
I think I'm going to write a children's book called Sometimes Mommy Says Fuck
06:29 PM March 09, 2008
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karrj
Talking to my frind about the environmental impact that will be caused but the extinction of the chia pet from the land of chi.
08:03 AM March 05, 2008
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PoppyBuxom
@margalit I like Twitter because I can hear from lots of people at once. And there are length restrictions. So people have to STFU.
07:42 PM March 03, 2008
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in reply to margalit
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papernapkin
If you can get down the driveway, why bother shoveling? Do my neighbors know something I don't? Is there a secret club I'm not a member of?
07:36 AM February 27, 2008
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karrj
I like your twitter, but it could use a trim.
03:04 PM January 30, 2008
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StephenColbert
Isn’t an agnostic just an atheist without balls?
06:32 PM May 10, 2007
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StephenColbert
There's nothing wrong with stretching the Truth. We stretch taffy, and that just makes it more delicious.
10:55 AM May 08, 2007
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