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minute

  1. Someone tell me the secret of neatly frosted cakes already. My cakes always look like they were frosted using car wash technology.
  2. @johnpwalter That made my head hurt--but I'm glad to see you around anyhow.
  3. Too many heroes; not enough heroics.
  4. Am I the only person left on the planet who'd rather RTFM than watch a "getting started" video?
  5. Good: My cat catches the moths that sneak into the house. Bad: My cat catches moths by smearing them down the wall.
  6. Dear Fashion Designer: It is not edgy to write "Tope" for "Taupe." It IS, however, very confusing to the reader.
  7. I heard a Miley Cyrus song on the radio today. I feel like I lost...something.
  8. Be at ImprovBoston tonight at 11:30. Or I can't make you laugh.
  9. Dear People Offended by Crap on TV: I do not have time to sign your petition. I am busy changing the channel.
  10. Whoever determined that 11 inches is max for one dimension of printer paper never drew a sitemap.
  11. Jonathan Katz stole my wallet today.
  12. Just tried a sample of the iconic Chanel No. 5. Wondering why millions of women want their wrists to smell like their armpits.
  13. All right, that insane month is over & I'm back in the funny business. Come out to ImprovBoston's Nightcap this Saturday and laugh at me!
  14. Dear Ebay Sellers: Rare != "I've never seen one before."
  15. I hate when I do a search and see "Yahoo! News" and then there's nothing at all Yahoo! about the news.
  16. Hey Outlook, you're a big doodiehead!
  17. Can someone please explain how to set cats back an hour?
  18. Instead of chairs, meeting rooms should have these in adult size. (Only not transparent.) http://www.tummytubusa.com
  19. Oh hai Twitter. Remember when we used to talk?
  20. Twitter spam follower asking me if I need a Twitter spam filter. Awesome.