mephjeff
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Godetevi, amici! Buon Natale! Fatemi un pompino!
about 15 hours ago
from web
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Had a tornado party. Everyone swept in, left a mess, and took the fuck off, and I'm sitting in the bathtub crying.
about 15 hours ago
from web
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RT @ Is it just me or does the freecreditreport.com guy look like he's got a serious case of coke-bloat in the newer commercials?
about 15 hours ago
from web
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The great length at which he was able to ring the Salvation Army bell clearly indicated he was using his masturbation hand. RT @
about 21 hours ago
from Tweetie
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There's no wine at the Hotel California? What a shithole.
about 21 hours ago
from Tweetie
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My throat feels like I just deep throated a chainsaw. (via @) Relatedly, my lady friends call me the Husqvarna.
about 22 hours ago
from Tweetie
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@ Touche.
about 22 hours ago
from Tweetie
in reply to TaboriHK
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RT @ I don't like when strangers stare at me while I eat, it makes me nervous. << Really? You don't look nervous.
about 22 hours ago
from web
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SOMETHING I LIKE: When people are yelling "No! NO!! NOOO!!!" and then the thing they didn't want to happen happens anyway.
about 22 hours ago
from web
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@ @ Ah, yes...Trent's ode to solipsism. I used to be a solipsist, until I wrecked my car.
about 23 hours ago
from web
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I can. not. stop watching. this trailer. Can't wait till April...with a name like Kick-Ass, it has to be good.
about 23 hours ago
from web
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@ Did that mature into a crush on Barry Bonds?
9:05 AM Dec 22nd
from Tweetie
in reply to kitchenrockstar
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RT @ I'd like a tank, complete w anti-SUV missiles and a margarita-dispensing system. Nothing says christmas like a drunk in a tank.
2:07 PM Dec 21st
from web
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Next time I go to the mall during Xmas shopping, I'm renting a monster truck.
11:55 AM Dec 21st
from Tweetie
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I can see again.
9:01 AM Dec 21st
from web
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@ We all are!
8:41 PM Dec 20th
from web
in reply to joelkodner
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@ Does it really matter any more? What with the internet and all.
8:40 PM Dec 20th
from web
in reply to meladiction
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@ Triskaidekaphobia ain't just for morons.
8:16 PM Dec 20th
from web
in reply to meladiction
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Holy shit...I just passed 3,000 tweets. I feel so hollow.
7:45 PM Dec 20th
from web
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@ What do I look like, a banker?
7:43 PM Dec 20th
from web
in reply to elvisofdallas
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- Name mephjeff
- Location Frontal Lobe
- Web http://www.myspac...
- Bio Mephistopheles Jefferson - Evil, but well-mannered.
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