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lordhoratio

@Monster_Face Awesome! I'll help you write it, and then we'll go to parties at Richard Dawkins' house! about 2 hours ago from Twitterrific in reply to Monster_Face
@Monster_Face I'd read that! about 2 hours ago from Twitterrific in reply to Monster_Face
TVs are becoming cartoonishly huge. This morning I saw a guy buying a flatscreen the size of a Volkswagen. 9:44 AM Nov 27th from Twitterrific
Yuppies: stop rubbing your 4-day weekends in my face. 9:40 AM Nov 27th from Twitterrific
Just saw an ad for Tom Waits' new album. It's called "Glitter and Doom." He never stops being awesome! 9:39 AM Nov 27th from Twitterrific
To everyone who is currently camped outside retail stores patiently waiting for Black Friday sales: you're an idiot. 7:48 AM Nov 26th from Twitterrific
@Monster_Face Way more complicated than that. I'll explain later. 9:16 AM Nov 25th from web in reply to Monster_Face
@Monster_Face No, she was speaking English. I just couldn't get my brain around her thick accent. 9:05 AM Nov 25th from web in reply to Monster_Face
I really need to learn Spanish. I was just talking to a neighbor and couldn't tell if she was saying her husband was sick, or her dog. 6:33 AM Nov 25th from web
CNN says the LHC is finally fixed and ready to start up again. I hope they have someone on hand at CERN to shoot the gremlins this time. 2:44 PM Nov 24th from web
The 2012 apocalypse is a silly myth. But you will still die someday. Suck on that fat hard reality! Hamburger time! 7:50 AM Nov 24th from Twitterrific
House finally referenced how Foreman looks just like Mike Tomlin! Huzzah! 5:06 PM Nov 23rd from web
@Monster_Face Misery loves company. They were inviting you to join them in ruining their lives. Don't accept that friend request! 2:59 PM Nov 19th from Twitterrific in reply to Monster_Face
I hate Christmas like my girlfriend hates children. 12:41 PM Nov 19th from Twitterrific
@kroneil Please convince my boss of the same thing. Then we can go have a barbecue. 5:16 AM Nov 19th from web in reply to kroneil
@Monster_Face Yep, that's the future alright. State-of-the-art communication electronics, cold water and broken lightbulbs. 7:00 PM Nov 18th from web in reply to Monster_Face
@Bulletproofheeb Bah! Pandering! 6:33 PM Nov 18th from web in reply to Bulletproofheeb
37 more days of idiotic Xmas commercials on TV. Cry. 6:28 PM Nov 18th from Twitterrific
Heh heh heh... cold November rain. 8:09 AM Nov 13th from txt
What, Lou Dobbs quit CNN? But now where will we go for our daily dose of paranoid racist bullshit? 7:01 AM Nov 12th from web