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lildb

  1. @shutterbitch I am equally in love with you. Maybe unequally. My love is self-abusive. it prefers to feel victimized in its inequality. 3:54 PM Nov 25th from UberTwitter in reply to shutterbitch
  2. @chickybaby ohhhh, I'm envious. Wish I could see it all again, fresh. (and back off Deb. She's mine.) 6:54 PM Nov 24th from UberTwitter in reply to chickybaby
  3. @borneochica hey! What the - aren't we sposed to be having phone sex right now? 8:35 AM Nov 24th from UberTwitter in reply to borneochica
  4. Auto-follow DMs are lame. ex: "thanks for the follow! enjoy my gassy tweetins! I'm a douche." 8:33 AM Nov 24th from UberTwitter
  5. @nuckingfutsmama which is why I have ceased peeing. 6:40 AM Nov 24th from UberTwitter in reply to nuckingfutsmama
  6. i'm just kidding. my mom has *loads* of fingers. i just confuse missing fingers with her being left-handed. it's basically the same, right? 10:07 PM Nov 23rd from web
  7. forewarned is four-fingered. oh. good. i'm offending those with missing digits when i'm JUST TRYING TO STOP FEELING SO PARANOID. sorry, mom. 10:07 PM Nov 23rd from web
  8. @VDog okay, but forewarned is foreplay. no. wait. that's not quite right. ? 10:03 PM Nov 23rd from web in reply to VDog
  9. @VDog SHIZ. I am not going back to work, am I. so be it. *inhales* 10:01 PM Nov 23rd from web in reply to VDog
  10. @gwenbell randy quaid x reindeer cup full of spiked egg nog + the v-sweater with the dicky = an equation for the ages. because, DICKY. 10:00 PM Nov 23rd from web in reply to gwenbell
  11. (and please tell lady @karensugarpants that i am mise en scene with her gf gaga, but that i'll give her back momentarily.) 9:59 PM Nov 23rd from web
  12. but i must. ciao, bellas. 9:58 PM Nov 23rd from web
  13. ahh, all you tweetles, with your exotic, savour (savoir? savior? jesus?) fare o' the wordeds, how i despise having to deny your pleasures. 9:58 PM Nov 23rd from web
  14. now! to work! honest. 9:56 PM Nov 23rd from web
  15. @VDog b'lieve you me, crackertasm is something i pursue on a regular basis. sometimes even *while* high on -- life. 9:56 PM Nov 23rd from web in reply to VDog
  16. and! working! *scrunches face into very, very tiny sober, serious pinched-up scrunch* oh, and also, listening to motown, now. SEE? SERIOUS. 9:50 PM Nov 23rd from web
  17. @VDog no. i mean, yes. WHATEVER WILL CONVINCE YOU THAT I AM THE UNHIGH. 9:49 PM Nov 23rd from web in reply to VDog
  18. nose back to grindstone, now. because i am sober, and working. BOTH OF THOSE THINGS ARE TRUE. 9:43 PM Nov 23rd from web
  19. @Jasperblu excellent point. if i weren't bleeding from the eyes i might have noticed it's midweek dining. (dehydration = eyeballs is sore.) 9:40 PM Nov 23rd from web in reply to Jasperblu
  20. @Neilochka Kennedy School! that's where we had our wedding rehearsal dinner (& his youngest underage sister got faded in the detention room) 9:38 PM Nov 23rd from web in reply to Neilochka