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katcan

  1. Made plans to attend THE sale to buy more clothes I can't wear.
  2. @jimray I just clogged an artery looking at that.
  3. Please tell me how it is an "accident" to get hit by a train as a pedestrian.
  4. me to SO: don't feed the baby so fast. SO to me: oh, he's fine. a mere 45 seconds later, projectile vomit of chicken/carrots ensues
  5. Wondering what is so funny about "funny cars".
  6. just found a random $42 in my purse that was hiding in an envelope from christmas 2006. at least delayed organization has its benefits.
  7. in a late tribute to carlin, 7 words that shouldn't be in email: viagra, organ, member, penisole, cum, cialix OR cializ.
  8. it's dragged people, not drug
  9. Feeling guilty re: shoes bought today.They could feed a sub-Saharan country.Sally Struthers is going to kick my ass, then I'm going to hell.
  10. @jimray don't know about the drops, but she uemura is the way to go for mascara
  11. threatening husband: if he wusses out and buys the portable AC unit, then i'm buying the gucci shoes i covet, dammit.
  12. @jimray totally when you pick them up...b/c what if they're not there when you go get 'em? first tip wouldn't be so desereved now, would it?
  13. Old Country Buffet should host Warren Buffett's $2.1 million power lunch. Billionaire Buffet. Best marketing opportunity ever for them.
  14. you know you're older than you think you are when you no longer recognize stars in public service announcements
  15. i hope michael phelps gets rid of that silly handlebar mustache before beijing...it's the freekin' olympics, not sturgis.
  16. the 30 inches between me and my TV at work seems like a vast ocean when my remote won't cooperate
  17. it's so hot out that i just saw birds panting like vito spatafore
  18. cable news better hope there's NEVER a handgun ban.it'd run outta "angry husband shoots wife for insurance cash" mysteries to run on weekend
  19. sending sis-in-law to manolo blahnik boutique sale on my behalf...now i just need somewhere other than thriftway or water tots to wear them
  20. had nearly uncontrollable urge to re all to billg's email: "and let the e-fellating begin!" but thought better of it. steveb proved my point