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k3ri

@a is this a trick question?about 8 hours ago from Adium in reply to a
@cellimachine Did you at least get a free lunch out of the deal?about 9 hours ago from Adium in reply to cellimachine
@rspeed @makeitepic because we're girls, and better than you. :Pabout 10 hours ago from Adium in reply to rspeed
@rspeed Please say if you get it wrong, they toss you out of the plane. PLEASE.about 10 hours ago from Adium in reply to rspeed
http://bit.ly/31V74 'nuff said.about 10 hours ago from Adium
When the boss doesn't want to hear it "because then he can't be called to testify" you know we need an adult.about 12 hours ago from Adium
#!/bin/sh while true do echo @holcasaur OMG DID YOU HEAR ABOUT MY CAT? ; sleep 30 ; done (BTW, I disabled CTRL C for exit)about 13 hours ago from Adium in reply to holcasaur
@joeweise Hit up the Bass Pro Shop, they have a gigantic freshwater tank.about 15 hours ago from Adium in reply to joeweise
@ICanHasStalker we TOLD you not to touch anything when you went up there, man. Now look what you've done. ;)about 15 hours ago from Adium in reply to ICanHasStalker
Let them eat cake!about 17 hours ago from TwitterFon
Headlines read: "Stump vanquished by local hero!" with the byline; "who mowed the lawn (salon cut vs K-5) and made dinner for his wife."5:08 PM Jul 13th from TwitterFon
My tax dollars pay for "highway maintenance" that looks exactly like the haircut I would give myself the day before K-5 school pictures. :(4:27 PM Jul 13th from TwitterFon
http://is.gd/1xeKu "Obese Exposed as Swine Flu Collides With Fat Epidemic"... "Huge problem" #obvious7:59 AM Jul 13th from Adium
@jontangerine OUCH! Hope that feels better soon.7:12 AM Jul 13th from Adium in reply to jontangerine
@papa_fire your face is killing us. ;)7:09 AM Jul 13th from Adium in reply to papa_fire
@shiflett SLACKER!6:57 AM Jul 13th from Adium in reply to shiflett
When did the mall become an obstacle course w/ rude, obnoxious, self centered sheep, hauling around their overfed whelps to buy more crap?2:17 PM Jul 12th from TwitterFon
Spotted my first mall security on a segway. He's wearing a bike helmet. We think he needs a siren and flashing lights to complete the look10:02 AM Jul 12th from TwitterFon
Is very confused and tired. /cartman voice "screw you guys, I'm going to sleep!" (I also don't think my back is up for anything yet. /sulks)6:21 PM Jul 11th from TwitterFon
#tmi "can you spare a square?" is useless when home alone. #timing Hubby arrived home early. #hero He brought toilet paper. #truelovedefined10:53 AM Jul 10th from TwitterFon

Name k3ri
Location iPhone: 39.160522,-76.723503
Web http://k3ri.com
Bio It's peanut buttah jelly time!

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